Oh sand, my sand, how comfortable

  You are to rest my weary bones

  Such a soothing flowing thing

  That’s made of tiny little stones

  Stones so polished by the flow

  Of River or of ocean tide

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  And nothing quite so comforting

  Within my weary bones abide

  Sand, you hug all surfaces

  In a firm and shaped embrace

  Even pressure everywhere

  surrounding every bony face

  In terms of dirt for decent naps

  I recommend a sandy pit

  To snuggle down into support

  And (here’s the really handy bit)

  When struggling to come awake

  To walk once more among the living

  Just give the sandy bed a shake

  It flows away (it’s so forgiving)

  Dust, or dirt? The vamps can have it.

  For their naps in coffin caves

  For me? I snuggle down in sand

  It makes a far more comfy grave.

  (But if you’re going to do that?

  Make sure to never have a cat.)

  Liquid Sand Hot Tub- Fluidized air bed (youtube.com)

  There's a reason why beach naps are soooo lovely.