Back at the hideout, Lena places her hand on my chest. A strange warmth spreads from her fingertips, followed by a sudden pulse of mana radiating outward. The air crackles with energy, and I feel something wrapping around me—like an invisible second skin tightening over my body.

  I flinch instinctively. What the hell is she doing? My Demon Eye flickers to life, revealing swirling threads of mana flowing from her palm. They twist and weave around me, sinking into my skin like ink dissolving in water.

  Lena smirks. “Relax, newbie. This won’t hurt... much.”

  I tense. “That’s not reassuring.”

  The mana pulses again, stronger this time, and a sudden pressure grips my chest. It’s not painful, but it feels like something is being pulled out—or suppressed. My demonic aura, the telltale signature marking me as different, flickers and starts to dim.

  From the side, Ravyn watches with his arms crossed. “Neat trick, huh? Lena’s a specialist in ‘hiding things.’ People, artifacts, even a stench like yours.”

  I exhale sharply as the sensation fades. I glance down at my hands. I look the same, but something feels... off. Lighter, almost. Like a part of me was just locked away.

  Lena pulls her hand back, shaking it like she just touched something disgusting. “There. Your demonic scent is suppressed—mostly. It won’t hold up against high-ranking priests or divine relics, but for everyday people? You’re just another dirty human now.”

  I flex my fingers, still adjusting to the feeling. “And what’s the catch?”

  Lena grins. “Smart boy. It needs to be reapplied every so often. And guess what? You’re stuck with us if you don’t want people sniffing you out.”

  Ravyn claps his hands together. “Now, let me ask you this. Do you want to permanently remove that stench or not?”

  He steps closer, his eerie black eyes locked onto mine. There’s a playfulness in his tone, but something about the way he says it makes my skin crawl.

  “If you want,” he continues, lowering his voice slightly, “then we can go to a friend of mine.” He clears his throat dramatically. “Ahem, a priest.”

  I narrow my eyes. “A priest?”

  Lena snorts. “Yeah, you heard him right. A priest. Funny, huh?”

  I fold my arms, my skepticism growing. “A priest that helps criminals suppress demonic energy? Sounds legit.”

  Ravyn grins. “Oh, he’s very legit. A real man of faith. Generous, too—as long as the price is right.”

  Something tells me this so-called priest is anything but holy. Still, if this means I won’t have to rely on Lena’s temporary fix, it might be worth checking out.

  I let out a slow breath. “Fine. Where do we find this guy?”

  Ravyn’s grin widens. “That’s the spirit. Get some rest, newbie. We leave at dawn.”

  What Ravyn said sticks in my mind. Will it be safe? I keep thinking about it, turning the idea over and over in my head. A priest that can remove my demonic aura… It sounds too good to be true. And yet, if it works, I wouldn’t have to rely on Lena’s magic or worry about being exposed.

  But I can’t forget why Zareth sent me here.

  To get stronger.

  That part is clear. But everything else? Not so much.

  Should I really help the demons? Or should I help the humans?

  I don’t have an answer. The more I think about it, the more tangled my thoughts become, looping endlessly between doubt and obligation.

  Eventually, my body makes the decision for me. Exhaustion from the fight with that mad demon finally catches up, and before I can think any further—

  I pass out.

  The sound of creaking wood wakes me up. My body aches all over, still sore from the fight. Slowly, I open my eyes—only to be met with Lena’s face, way too close for comfort.

  Wait.

  I blink. The faint sway of movement, the rhythmic clatter of hooves against dirt… we’re on a wagon. And my head is resting on something soft.

  Hold on—

  I immediately sit up as soon as I realize I was sleeping on Lena’s lap. “W-What the hell?!”

  Ravyn, sitting across from us, bursts out laughing. “Hahahaha! Oh man, that was gold! You should’ve seen your face just now!”

  I glare at him, still disoriented. “Shut up.”

  Lena just sighs, stretching her arms. “You kept mumbling in your sleep. Thought you were having a nightmare.”

  I rub my face. “More like a fever dream.”

  Ravyn smirks. “Well, dream time’s over. We’re almost at the Holy Kingdom of Sletopia.”

  I pause, my mind finally catching up. “Wait, we’re already on the way?”

  Lena nods. “You passed out as soon as we left. We figured you needed the rest.”

  I exhale, glancing around. The wagon is old and rickety, pulled by two horses. The road ahead stretches into the distance, leading toward towering spires barely visible through the morning mist.

  The Holy Kingdom of Sletopia.

  A place ruled by priests and paladins.

  A place that would probably execute me on the spot if they knew what I really was.

  I tighten my grip on my cloak. This is gonna be fun.

  We all put on our gear and mask's

  Ravyn speaks up. “Oh yeah.” He reaches up and removes his mask, revealing sharp, well-defined features and a cocky grin. “We should take these off. We’ll get killed on the spot if we keep them on.”

  I frown, instinctively touching my own mask. “Wait… why?”

  “They don’t like people who hide their identities,” he replies, tossing his mask into the wagon. “The Holy Kingdom’s got strict rules about that. Too many criminals and cultists use masks to avoid being recognized.”

  Lena sighs and removes hers as well. “Basically, if you walk in wearing one, you might as well be screaming, ‘I have something to hide! Please arrest or execute me!’”

  I hesitate. Great. Just great.

  Reluctantly, I remove my mask, stuffing it inside my cloak. The air feels colder against my face, and I suddenly feel exposed.

  “Better get used to it,” Ravyn says, leaning back with a smirk. “We’re heading straight into enemy territory, newbie.”

  I exhale, glancing toward the distant spires of Sletopia. Let’s hope this ‘priest’ of his is worth the risk.

  Mark speaks up, his deep voice breaking the steady rhythm of the wagon wheels. “We’re here.”

  Ravyn claps his hands together, a wide grin spreading across his face. “Ah, my old friend! We’re gonna meet again!”

  I glance at him. “Are you talking about the priest?”

  He rolls his eyes. “Duh, are you dumb or something?”

  “Huh?! I was just asking—”

  Before I can finish, he suddenly shushes me, holding up a hand. “Shhh. The line’s too long. Is there an event or something?”

  I frown and peek out from the wagon. The road leading to Sletopia’s massive gates is packed with wagons and travelers, all waiting to enter. The sheer number of people here is overwhelming—traders, pilgrims, and adventurers, all stuck in the slow-moving line.

  Then, suddenly, a golden carriage beaming with divine radiance glides past us, escorted by armored knights. It doesn’t stop. It doesn’t wait. It moves straight toward the entrance, and the massive gates part for it without hesitation.

  Lena whistles. “Must be someone important.”

  I watch as the carriage vanishes into the city. Great. Not only do we have to wait, but we’re also in a kingdom full of people who’d love to kill me.

  I sigh, leaning back. “So… how long are we gonna be stuck here?”

  Ravyn groans. “Long enough to make me regret coming.”

  After what feels like an eternity, we’ve barely moved. If there were ten wagons in front of us earlier, now there’s maybe seven.

  Ravyn groans loudly before finally snapping. “God dammit! This is taking too long! Do they want to die or something?!”

  A few people in the nearby wagons turn to look at him, some annoyed, others wary.

  Lena sighs. “Ravyn, shut up before you get us thrown in jail before we even get inside.”

  He throws his hands up. “I’m just saying! What the hell is taking so long? At this rate, I’ll die of boredom before we even meet the priest.”

  I lean back against the wagon. “Welcome to bureaucracy.”

  Mark, who’s been quiet this whole time, simply crosses his arms and mutters, “Patience.”

  Ravyn groans even louder, slumping dramatically. “Ugh, fine. But if we’re still here in an hour, I’m storming in.”

  Lena smirks. “Right. You go ahead and do that. Let me know how long it takes for the paladins to skewer you.”

  Ravyn grumbles something under his breath but doesn’t argue.

  I exhale, watching as the line barely moves forward. This is going to be a long day…

  And finally, after what seems like a lifetime, we’re now in front of the gate.

  The towering walls of Sletopia loom over us, pristine white stone gleaming under the sunlight. Massive iron gates stand open, guarded by heavily armed knights in polished silver armor, their tabards bearing the sigil of the Holy Kingdom.

  Just as we’re about to move forward, two knights step in front of the wagon, raising their hands to halt us. Their armor is pristine—far too expensive for ordinary guards.

  “Reason for entry?” one of them asks, his voice sharp and authoritative.

  Ravyn leans forward with his signature smirk. “Pilgrimage.”

  The knight stares at him, unimpressed.

  Lena elbows him in the ribs before sighing. “We’re travelers here for trade and worship. We have business with the church.”

  The knight glances at all of us, his gaze lingering on me for a second longer than I’d like. I keep my expression neutral, but my muscles tense under his scrutiny.

  “Papers?” he demands.

  Ravyn casually pulls out a rolled-up document from his coat and hands it over. The knight takes it, unrolling it carefully before passing it to the other guard. They exchange glances, seemingly checking for anything suspicious.

  I hold my breath. If anything seems off, we’re screwed.

  After a painfully long silence, the first knight finally nods. “You may enter.”

  The gates creak open, and our wagon slowly rolls forward into the Holy Kingdom of Sletopia.

  As the wagon rolls past the towering gates, I feel an uneasy weight settle in my chest. We made it inside, but that doesn’t mean we’re safe.

  The Holy Kingdom of Sletopia is nothing like I expected. The streets are wide and immaculate, paved with smooth white stone. Towering buildings with intricate golden inlays stretch toward the sky, their stained-glass windows glimmering under the sunlight. Priests and paladins walk among the citizens, their flowing robes and polished armor giving them an air of divine authority.

  But the most unsettling part?

  The people.

  Unlike the bustling, chaotic marketplaces of normal cities, Sletopia’s citizens move in an eerie order. No one shouts, no one pushes past each other, and there’s an unnatural stillness in the air. It feels too... perfect. Too controlled.

  Lena lets out a low whistle. “Still creepy as ever.”

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  Ravyn leans back, stretching his arms. “Ahh, good old Sletopia! The city where if you sneeze too loud, a priest will probably bless you to death!”

  I shift uncomfortably. “You sure your ‘friend’ is actually here?”

  Ravyn grins. “Oh, he’s here, alright. But first, we need to lose any unwanted attention.”

  I glance around. The paladins stationed at street corners are already eyeing our wagon with mild interest. Yeah, we stand out.

  Ravyn turns to Mark. “Time for Plan B.”

  Mark simply nods, then grabs the reins and steers the wagon into a side street. Within seconds, we slip away from the main road, weaving through smaller, less crowded paths.

  “Where exactly are we going?” I ask.

  Ravyn chuckles. “To church, of course.”

  I blink. “Huh?”

  Lena smirks. “You heard him. We’re meeting a priest, right? Where else would he be?”

  I have a bad feeling about this.

  The wagon comes to a stop in front of a smaller, older chapel tucked away in a quiet district. Unlike the grand cathedrals lining the city’s main roads, this one looks... worn. The once-pristine stone is cracked, and the golden engravings are faded. The holy symbols above the door are chipped, as if someone tried to scrape them away.

  Ravyn hops off the wagon and stretches. “Ah, home sweet home!”

  I stare at him. “This is the place?”

  He turns to me, grinning. “What, were you expecting some grand cathedral?”

  Lena steps down next. “Come on, newbie. Time to meet the most unholy holy man in the kingdom.”

  I sigh and follow. I swear, if this priest turns out to be just as insane as these guys, I’m walking out.

  With that thought, we step inside.

  As we step inside the chapel, I immediately notice two things.

  One: It’s way dustier than any holy place should be. The air is thick with the scent of old parchment, melted wax, and… is that cheap perfume?

  Two: There’s a man standing at the altar, humming to himself as he polishes a golden chalice. He’s tall and lean, wearing the usual priestly robes—but they’re slightly disheveled, the top buttons undone like he’s trying to look holy but also just rolled out of bed. His long, wavy brown hair falls over his face, but when he hears us enter, he flips it back dramatically.

  Then he sees Lena.

  And his entire demeanor changes.

  His eyes widen. His lips part. The chalice slips from his hands, clanking loudly onto the floor.

  “L-Lena?!” His voice cracks mid-sentence. He practically glides forward, his arms open as if expecting a hug—or a full-blown marriage proposal. “My radiant goddess! You grace my humble home once more!”

  Lena groans, rubbing her temples. “Great. I forgot how much I hate this part.”

  I watch in horror as the priest drops to his knees in front of her, grabbing her hands like she just descended from heaven itself. His eyes shine with pure, unfiltered devotion. “Oh, how cruel the fates must be, to keep us apart for so long! Every moment without you is like—like—” He gasps dramatically. “A thousand years of suffering!”

  Ravyn smirks, crossing his arms. “Still down bad as ever, huh, Father Gabriel?”

  The priest—Father Gabriel, apparently—snaps his head toward Ravyn, his expression darkening instantly. “Oh. It’s you.”

  The sheer venom in his voice makes it sound like Ravyn personally burned down his house.

  Ravyn shrugs. “Missed you too, buddy.”

  Gabriel huffs before turning back to Lena, his lovestruck gaze returning instantly. “Oh, my sweet midnight rose! Have you finally come to accept my heart? To say those three beautiful words?”

  Lena sighs. “Yeah. Fix. His. Aura.” She jerks a thumb at me.

  Gabriel finally acknowledges my existence—and the change is instant. His face twists into something downright hostile. His eyes narrow as he looks me up and down, as if trying to determine if I deserve to breathe the same air as Lena.

  “And who is this?” he asks coldly.

  I blink. “Uh… Eli?”

  Gabriel leans in, his smile strained. “Eli.” He says my name like it personally offended him. “And what, pray tell, is your relationship with my Lena?”

  I blink again. “Uh—your Lena?”

  Lena pinches the bridge of her nose. “Gabriel, we’ve talked about this. So many times.”

  Gabriel ignores her, his glare intensifying as he grabs my shoulders and shakes me. “Answer me, mortal! Are you her beloved?! Have you stolen her heart while I toiled away in loneliness?!”

  “What?! No!” I stammer, trying to pry him off. “I barely know her! And you’re shaking me too hard—”

  He releases me dramatically, clutching his chest. “Ah. A coward’s answer!”

  Ravyn, meanwhile, is leaning against a pillar, laughing his ass off. “Oh, this is so worth the trip.”

  Lena sighs and grabs Gabriel by the collar, shaking him this time. “Enough. I need you to fix his aura before the paladins sniff him out and kill all of us. Can you do that, or do I have to find someone else?”

  Gabriel gasps. “Oh, my ruthless angel! You wound me!” He places a hand over his heart, pretending to stagger back like she just stabbed him. “Of course, I shall aid you. I would move heaven and earth for you! I would fight an army! I would—”

  “Gabriel.” Lena’s voice is dangerously low.

  He straightens immediately. “Right. Fixing the aura. Of course.”

  He clears his throat and gestures toward the altar. “Come forth, Eli. Let me rid you of your filthy, disgusting, absolutely horrid demonic stench.”

  I hesitate. “You could’ve left out those last few words.”

  “Not really, no.”

  I sigh, stepping forward. This guy better not kill me out of jealousy.

  Father Gabriel grabs a large, ornate cross from the altar and holds it high above his head. His eyes flutter shut as he begins muttering a string of prayers under his breath. The air around him feels heavier, thick with mana, as if he’s actually channeling divine energy.

  I shift uncomfortably. What is this? An exorcism?

  He suddenly throws holy water at me.

  “ACK—WHAT THE HELL?!” I stumble back, shaking the water off my face.

  Gabriel gasps, pointing at me like he just confirmed some terrible truth. “The unholy one recoils from blessed water! Truly, a wretched demon walks among us!”

  I groan. “I recoiled because you just threw cold water in my face, you lunatic!”

  Lena sighs. “Gabriel, stop being dramatic and just fix his aura.”

  He grumbles under his breath but obeys, reluctantly lowering the cross. He presses two fingers to my forehead and begins chanting—actual magic this time, not just theatrical nonsense. A warm sensation spreads through my body, and I can feel something shifting, as if my very essence is being veiled by divine energy.

  I exhale, the weight on my chest slowly lifting. Huh. This might actually work.

  Meanwhile, Ravyn is still chuckling in the background, clearly enjoying my suffering. “You’re handling this better than I expected, newbie.”

  I roll my eyes, wiping the holy water off my face. I hope Porky’s doing better than I am.

  Porky was, in fact, thriving.

  While I was getting drenched in holy water and nearly exorcised, my oversized, drooling companion had somehow found himself in the middle of a feast.

  The moment we entered Sletopia, some kind-hearted priests (or maybe just really gullible ones) took one look at Porky’s massive size and assumed he was a sacred beast. They had no idea he was just a giant, gluttonous boar who would eat literally anything.

  And so, while I suffered, Porky sat comfortably in a courtyard surrounded by priests who were feeding him fruits, vegetables, and even freshly baked bread.

  "Truly, a divine creature!" one priest marveled, stroking his beard.

  "Indeed!" another agreed. "He must have been sent by the heavens to test our generosity!"

  Porky, blissfully unaware of his newfound holy status, simply snorted and inhaled an entire basket of apples.

  The priests gasped in awe.

  "Look at his divine appetite!"

  "Such a blessed beast! We must continue to provide for him!"

  Porky let out a loud, satisfied burp.

  "Amen," one priest whispered in reverence.

  I don’t know what compelled me to think about Porky at that moment, but I felt a deep, nagging suspicion that my boar was doing much better than I was.

  Gabriel finally pulls his fingers away from my forehead, sighing dramatically. “It is done.”

  I blink, shaking off the strange warmth that had settled over me. I focus for a moment, testing my senses. My demonic aura feels... hidden. It’s still there, but far more suppressed than before.

  Lena nods in approval. “Good. That should keep him from getting burned at the stake.”

  Gabriel crosses his arms. “Of course! I am a master of my craft! A miracle worker! The most talented, most devoted, most—”

  Lena claps a hand over his mouth. “Yeah, yeah, thanks, Gabriel.”

  Ravyn, still grinning, elbows me. “So, how do you feel?”

  I take a deep breath. “Like I hopefully won’t die the second a priest looks at me.”

  Gabriel suddenly rips Lena’s hand off his mouth and glares at me. “I hope you appreciate this, you filthy heathen. This spell is a masterpiece, and yet, I had to waste it on you.”

  I sigh. “Yeah, thanks, I feel so blessed.”

  Gabriel huffs but then dramatically throws an arm over Lena’s shoulders. “Now, my beloved! Will you finally accept my love as payment for my divine services?”

  Lena wordlessly kicks him in the shin.

  Gabriel collapses to the floor in pain. “My soul weeps…”

  I pinch the bridge of my nose. “Can we leave now?”

  Ravyn laughs. “Oh, not yet. Now we get to rob a noble.”

  I stare at him. “What?”

  Ravyn grins. “What, you thought we’d come all this way just for church?”

  I groan. I really, really hope Porky’s having a worse time than me.

  Porky had just been crowned a holy beast by the temple.

  I crouch behind a stone wall, my hood pulled low as I watch the grand estate in front of us. The noble’s mansion is massive, its towering walls lined with golden lanterns that flicker against the night sky. Armed guards patrol the perimeter, their polished armor glinting under the moonlight.

  We’re really doing this, huh?

  “This is a terrible idea,” I mutter.

  “Oh, definitely,” Ravyn replies cheerfully, crouched beside me. “But terrible ideas are the most fun.”

  I exhale sharply, turning to him. “Alright, so what’s the plan? Sneak in? Bribe a guard? Maybe, I don’t know, not commit a crime?”

  Ravyn pats my shoulder. “Don’t worry, newbie. We have a foolproof strategy.”

  Lena, crouched on my other side, smirks. “We break in through the second-floor balcony, steal the goods, and get out.”

  I stare at her. Then at Ravyn. Then back at her.

  “That’s it? That’s your ‘foolproof’ strategy?”

  Ravyn nods. “Yup!”

  I rub my face. “Do you guys even know what’s inside the mansion?”

  “Not really,” Ravyn admits. “But that’s what makes it exciting!”

  I’m going to die with these people.

  Mark, who’s been silent this whole time, suddenly steps forward. “Less talking. More moving.”

  He lifts a massive grappling hook with one hand and hurls it up toward the balcony. It hooks onto the railing with a loud clank.

  I freeze. “That was loud.”

  Lena shrugs. “Eh, the guards are drunk. They won’t notice.”

  As if on cue, a nearby guard leans against the wall, taking a long, exaggerated sip from his flask. After a few seconds, he lets out a deep, satisfied sigh… and promptly collapses face-first onto the grass.

  “…Huh.” I blink. “Okay, never mind.”

  “See?” Ravyn grins. “Foolproof.”

  Lena starts climbing up first, moving with practiced ease. Mark follows, silent as ever. I hesitate for a second, then glance at Ravyn.

  “You go first,” I say.

  He chuckles. “What, scared?”

  “No, I just don’t trust you not to kick me off the rope for fun.”

  “…Fair.” He climbs up.

  I take a deep breath, shake my head, and start climbing. This is so, so stupid.

  The moment I step onto the balcony, Ravyn pulls me down behind a large pillar. “Shh,” he whispers, eyes gleaming with excitement. “The real fun starts now.”

  Lena kneels near a window, peeking inside. “Looks like a study. No guards.”

  Mark silently moves forward and punches the lock. The entire thing shatters.

  I blink. “Subtle.”

  We slip inside, and I get my first good look at the place. The study is huge, with bookshelves lining the walls, a fireplace still faintly glowing with embers, and a desk covered in expensive trinkets and papers.

  Ravyn rubs his hands together. “Alright, loot time.”

  Lena starts rummaging through drawers. Mark examines a chest in the corner. Ravyn pockets an entire golden inkstand.

  Meanwhile, I just stand there.

  What the hell am I even doing?

  I was summoned by a Demon Lord. Trained to fight. Sent to get stronger. And now I’m robbing some rich guy’s house with a group of professional criminals.

  I sigh. “This wasn’t in the hero’s journey.”

  Ravyn tosses me a small pouch. “Quit monologuing and grab something. We don’t have all night.”

  I roll my eyes and start looking through the desk drawers. Coins, documents, some weird crystal paperweight—

  Then I spot something.

  A sealed letter with a wax crest. The symbol is unfamiliar, but something about it feels… off.

  Before I can think too much about it, a voice echoes through the halls.

  “Who’s there?!”

  We all freeze.

  Lena curses under her breath. “Time to go.”

  The sound of rushed footsteps gets closer.

  Mark grabs the nearest sack of loot. Ravyn kicks open the window. Lena leaps onto the rope.

  I barely have time to pocket the letter before Ravyn shoves me out the window.

  The last thing I hear before I hit the rope is a loud, irritated voice shouting—

  “THE HOLY BEAST HAS ESCAPED!”

  …Wait.

  Porky?!

  Somewhere inside the mansion, absolute chaos had erupted.

  Porky—my glorious, gluttonous companion—was on the run.

  Apparently, the noble had also mistaken him for a holy beast.

  How did this happen? Simple.

  Porky, being the massive, food-obsessed menace that he is, had somehow wandered into the mansion’s lavish dining hall. The servants, thinking he was some sort of divine creature, had offered him a feast.

  Porky, naturally, accepted.

  One plate turned into two. Two turned into twelve.

  By the time the noble himself arrived, Porky was passed out in the middle of the table, surrounded by nothing but empty platters and crumbs.

  The noble—some pompous-looking guy in ridiculous golden robes—had collapsed to his knees in horror.

  “MY ROYAL BANQUET!”

  But before anyone could react, Porky suddenly woke up.

  His tiny, beady eyes locked onto a fresh, untouched cake at the other end of the room.

  And just like that—

  The Great Porky Chase began.

  I barely manage to hold onto the rope as I slide down, my heart pounding.

  Shouts echo from inside the mansion. The guards are fully awake now. The sound of plates crashing, furniture breaking, and people screaming is mixed in with one very familiar, very loud boar snort.

  Ravyn lands beside me with a huge grin. “Hahahaha! What the hell is going on in there?!”

  Lena lands next, rolling her eyes. “I don’t know, and I don’t care. We need to move.”

  Mark drops down without a rope like a damn mountain falling from the sky. He straightens up, completely unfazed. “Go.”

  We break into a sprint, dashing through the noble’s manicured gardens toward the outer wall.

  Then, just as we reach our escape route—

  BOOM.

  The doors of the mansion burst open.

  A blur of pink and brown comes charging toward us.

  My brain barely has time to process the ungodly noise that follows.

  “SKRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!”

  I turn my head just in time to see Porky, covered in cake and expensive tablecloths, barreling straight toward us like a divine pig-shaped meteor.

  And behind him?

  AT LEAST TWENTY GUARDS.

  “CATCH THE BEAST!” one of them screams.

  “IT ATE THE SACRED FRUIT!” another wails.

  “SOMEONE STOP IT!”

  I don’t even have time to react before Porky SLAMS INTO ME.

  I go flying.

  Lena barely dodges. Ravyn is laughing so hard he can’t breathe.

  I hit the ground hard, and before I can even process my own suffering, Porky is already back on his feet, sprinting for the exit.

  Ravyn gasps between laughs. “OH—OH MY GOD—THE HOLY BEAST HAS FALLEN TO DARKNESS—”

  Lena grabs him by the collar and drags him forward. “RUN, YOU IDIOT!”

  I scramble up, chasing after Porky.

  Mark is already kicking down part of the outer wall like it’s made of paper. He gestures at us. “Through.”

  We leap through the hole just as the guards reach the garden.

  A few arrows whizz past us.

  I swear I hear the noble screaming about divine judgment.

  And just like that—

  We escape.

  Panting, covered in dirt, cake, and regret, we finally come to a stop in a dark alley.

  For a long moment, nobody speaks.

  Then Ravyn just… collapses against a wall, wheezing with laughter.

  Lena groans. “I can’t believe we just pulled off a heist… and the most wanted thing in that mansion ended up being a freaking boar.”

  I, still recovering from getting bulldozed by Porky, glare at him.

  Porky, sitting happily beside a stolen basket of grapes, just snorts.

  I point at him, wheezing. “Never… again…”

  Ravyn, still laughing, wipes a tear from his eye. “Ohhh, man. I take it back, newbie. You’re fun to have around.”

  I groan. “Someone kill me.”

  Lena pats my back. “Don’t worry. There’s always next time.”

  I stare at her. “That’s the opposite of comforting.”

  She smirks. “Exactly.”

  And just like that—

  I realize I’m never escaping these lunatics.

  I stare at Ravyn, who’s still on the ground, wheezing with laughter. His entire body shakes as he gasps for air, completely useless.

  I hold up the bounty poster with Porky’s face on it. “Why. Did. We. Even. Rob. That. Noble?”

  Ravyn wipes a tear from his eye, still grinning. “Oh, c’mon, newbie, look at this! This is comedy gold!”

  I don’t laugh. “I thought we don’t rob without reason.”

  Lena, sitting on a crate and inspecting a gold necklace she "acquired," glances at me. “Normally, yeah. We don’t steal for fun.”

  I gesture wildly at everything that just happened. “That sure didn’t feel like a serious mission!”

  Ravyn finally calms down enough to talk. He sits up, stretching. “Alright, alright, I’ll explain.”

  He leans back against the wall, grinning. “That noble? Baron Callis Evendawn. He’s not just some rich snob. He’s got deep ties with the Church and funds a lot of their ‘demon-hunting’ programs.”

  I frown. “So he’s anti-demon?”

  Lena snorts. “Understatement. He funds priests who experiment on people they suspect of being ‘tainted.’”

  I tense at that. “Experiment?”

  Ravyn nods. “Yup. Anyone who might have demonic blood? They get ‘cleansed.’ And let’s just say their idea of purification isn’t exactly gentle.”

  I swallow hard. “And you didn’t think to mention this before we broke in?”

  Ravyn shrugs. “Would it have changed anything?”

  I open my mouth. Close it. …Okay, fair point.

  Lena smirks. “Besides, we got something really valuable.”

  She tosses me a sealed letter—the one I grabbed from the noble’s study.

  I blink. “What is this?”

  “No idea,” she says. “But nobles don’t seal letters unless they’re important. Might be dirt on Evendawn. Might be something bigger.”

  Ravyn leans in, his grin widening. “You up for a little detective work, newbie?”

  I stare at the letter. Then at them. Then at Porky, who is still happily chewing on stolen grapes like he didn’t just ruin a noble’s life.

  I sigh. “Why do I feel like this is only going to get worse?”

  Lena chuckles. “Because it is.”

  Ravyn claps me on the back. “Welcome to the fun side of crime, newbie.”

  I groan. I should’ve just stayed unconscious.