Just Don't Give A {Fluff} [Parody]
Joshua walks up to Sonic, who's standing near a rapping contest that's being held by Jet the Hawk.
Joshua: You getting up there soon?
Sonic: Yeah. You wanna join me?
Joshua: … I'll think about it.
Some music starts up.
Sonic: That's me!
He runs away faster than Joshua can see him.
Joshua: Uh. Bye.
Jet: Hey! Get yo hands in the air and get 'em clapping a storm! 'Cause, this is what you thought it wasn't! You want a new somethin'? Check out my man. He goes by, uh-
Sonic shoves Jet out of the way.
Sonic: Slim Speedy. Y'all look at me like, “Him needy.” Thought you'd get a peace treaty? Like Mike, I came to beat cleanly. I'm drugging cousins, making husbands, I'm a naughty rotten crimer. Acting like a shoddy bottin' writer. You more jacked up than the wack buck you stole yo slacks from. You ain't gonna sell yo two lips if you promise to kiss bum. Admit it, suck it, while we comin' out in the open, I'm doing Placid Duck chicks while you crackin' and copin'!
Joshua: My name is Joshua Chitwood, I'm a game-aholic.
Crowd: Hi, Joshua.
Joshua: I have no fans, but I'm still ballin'!
Sonic: Better hide your crotch itch, 'cause I'm runnin' quick to strip yo pants.
Joshua: Brought a cross stitch just to come and rip yo knacks!
Sonic: Chicks in bunches pout just to get a fiddle, Jack!
Joshua: Fakes gettin' punched out by Little Mac!
Sonic: We kickin' 'em out like a hacky sack!
Joshua: Better be holdin' yo tiny sacky back to get some slack!
Sonic: When you see me on the dock makin' a mock, screaming, “Blow Me Off” I mean suck caulk! {Call-k}
Joshua: I just don't give a fluff!
Sonic: Walking around with yo flock, talking smack like Harry Mack and saying I'm wack.
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Joshua: I just don't snuff a duck!
Sonic: So, put my game back in the pack, run and tell 'em my stuff sucks yo crack.
Joshua: I just don't stuff a buck!
Sonic: But, see me on the beat and eat the muck. 'Cause, you about to get plucked, nulled, and cucked.
Joshua: I just don't shuck a schmuck!
Sonic: Smell nicer than Pete, “Better make a silly clone.” Idea won't last when I come to crush yo willy bone! I'm sick enough to nude strip you for no reason. Throw you out in winter season with crude nips freezin'! Spice without sneezin', this the freak you view. I skip the quality check, put out a monstrosity wreck, still say I'm peak you do!
Joshua: I'll make yo meek man leave you. Read the old epistles. This is James Bond, chick. Hold your golden pistols. My suit forms like Aran. Blast ya with colder missiles. Fake Shady. Eminem was the old potentials.
Sonic: Nortin', courtin', workin' in orc pits. Path to logical liar, saying I'm supportin' Kevorkian. The tooniest, juiciest, extraneous, erratic! Compulsive thinker, impulsive stinker, dramatic! Half wolf, half hog. Feeding yo body to my dog as the Twitchers Pog!
Joshua: Woof!
Sonic: When you see me on the dock makin' a mock, screaming, “Blow Me Off” I mean suck caulk! {Call-k}
Joshua: I just don't give a fluff!
Sonic: Walking around with yo flock, talking smack like Harry Mack and saying I'm wack.
Joshua: I just don't snuff a duck!
Sonic: So, put my game back in the pack, run and tell 'em my stuff sucks yo crack.
Joshua: I just don't stuff a buck!
Sonic: But, see me on the beat and eat the muck. 'Cause, you about to get plucked, nulled, and cucked.
Joshua: I just don't shuck a schmuck!
Sonic: Still mature enough to eat Kid Cuisine. I'm a caged meme and I'm on stage screamin' when I could be burstin' machines! I'm the superior fiend, supremely mean.
Joshua: Failin' up while my bud's just winnin'. Lyrically reigned in and I need a new pinion.
Sonic: Screw cappin' a mule. I'm flippin' manhole covers.
Joshua: I'll rewrite yo stool just to smell it better!
Sonic: Can't take no treasure. Busy gettin' stitches.
Joshua: Sick of bosses riggin' problems just to stop me ditchin'. In school, I never said much. Too busy spewing ear blood. Kids mouths, words gushed. Made my skull crush, so hush hush! They say I'm slim-ing. They just got played and sprayed with Raid without a chance to evade, 'cause I'm just a thin bein'!
Sonic: Don't mistake me for some bloke, or I'mma beat again! Think I won't grab yo toad and shears and cleave it in? Got ya so scared you run with expedience. But, got ya ensnared to beat you to obedience!
Joshua: Better watch out for me and him, 'cause-!
Sonic: When you see me on the dock makin' a mock, screaming, “Blow Me Off” I mean suck caulk! {Call-k}
Joshua: I just don't give a fluff!
Sonic: Walking around with yo flock, talking smack like Harry Mack and saying I'm wack.
Joshua: I just don't snuff a duck!
Sonic: So, put my game back in the pack, run and tell 'em my stuff sucks yo crack.
Joshua: I just don't stuff a buck!
Sonic: But, see me on the beat and eat the muck. 'Cause, you about to get plucked, nulled, and cucked.
Joshua: I just don't shuck a schmuck!
Sonic: Screw the entire party!
Joshua: We out! Getting tardy, like Cardi.
Sonic voiced by Slim Shady
Joshua voiced by Eminem