Robert took a deep breath, typing up the sequence to initialize the Mecha Man suit. He held up the new Proto Pulse that Royd had created, inspected it closely, and as he lowered his hand down, looked at the display in front of him. It showed everyone who had come to see the test, pretty much all of Z-Team except for Flambae. They all gave him encouraging thumbs up.

  “Hey everybody,” Robert said as he continued the power-up sequence. “I appreciate you coming to see this. Your support means a lot.”

  “More than a lot,” Punch Up said. “It means nine-hundred and thirty six American dollars.” He chuckled. “Cash, lad.”

  Prism said, “We’re only here because these broke asses want proof before they pay.”

  “That actually makes way more sense,” Robert noted with amusement.

  “Can’t believe you actually hung out with these fuckers,” Chase said.

  “You jealous, old man?” Visi asked.

  “Of what?” Chase asked, glaring at her. “Let me guess, you get into a bar fight? I’m right, right? That’s what criminals do at bars. They ruin everyone’s fun. In fact, if you’re gonna make me stand next to a criminal, you could at least hurry this shit up.”

  “If you’re gonna make me stand next to Benjamin fuckin’ Button,” Visi shot back, “you could at least change his diaper.”

  “You’re the only one here that’s full of shit,” Chase said.

  Robert grinned at their banter, still getting everything ready to go inside the suit. “You missed Flambae trying to kill me after I revealed my identity.”

  “I saved his life,” Golem said. “His whole ass life. Now he owes me a whole life.”

  “We’re even though,” Robert said, “cuz I paid for your tacos.”

  “Right, right, right, I forgot,” Golem said. “So I would easily exchange your life for the double crunch kind.”

  Robert started powering up the suit as Royd said, “Oooooookay, Proto Pulse test nineteen ready to commence. We good when you good, Mecha Man.”

  “Engaging Proto Pulse now,” Robert said, and he inserted the tiny canister, pushing the chamber into the locked position.

  The mech lit up and Royd gave a thumbs up. “All readings supah stable.”

  “Alright,” Robert said. “Ready for launch.”

  “Rahja dat,” Royd responded.

  Everything came online and Robert struck a superhero pose with the mech.

  “See there?” Prism asked. “Is that enough confirmation for you cheap ass bitches? Pay me my money.”

  “Fuckin’ hell,” Punch Up sighed, pulling out his cash.

  “Told y’all,” Prism gloated, also taking money from Malevola. “It’s so obvious he don’t have super powers.”

  “It’s a fucking waste of time,” Malevola said. “If he was gonna lie about being a hero, why would he pick Mecha Man?”

  “Uh, reminder, the mic is still open,” Robert said casually. He tested some shadow boxing with his new suit. “Not bad, right?”

  “Looks better than the original,” Chase said.

  “The smoke is a little overkill,” Invisigal said.

  “I thought the same too,” Robert said, “but I think the purple is a nice touch—”

  “What smoke?” Royd asked. Then a moment later he yelled, “SHUT IT DOWN!”

  Red alerts blared inside Robert’s cockpit. The Proto Pulse started sparking inside its locked chamber. Robert coughed on the smoke and tried to power the suit down.

  “Help him, Royd!” Invisigal shouted, banging on the glass.

  “Just get him out!” Chase yelled.

  Royd said, “Shit!” and ran towards the door.

  But the Mecha Man suit was flailing around, and Robert had accidentally knocked a rack of heavy boxes against the door. Royd struggled to get into the room with him.

  “It’s locked down,” Punch Up said.

  “Ah, fuck, I’m on it!” Malevola yelled. She threw her hand out and a portal appeared.

  Royd sprinted through, into the room with Robert. He grabbed the Mecha Man suit and steadied it as Robert mashed the eject button, but an alert flashed saying that the eject was failing. The alarms were growing more frantic, the smoke more dense. Robert shielded his face, dread coiling in his gut.

  “No…” Royd muttered. “GET DOWN!”

  He ran away from the suit.

  “Oh shit,” Robert said, stuck in the cockpit.

  The suit exploded.

  ***

  Robert awoke, lying in a hospital bed with Beef on his lap. He sat up and saw Royd in the room with him, bandages wrapped around his head and one arm in a sling.

  “Welcome back,” Chase said, stepping up beside the bed.

  “How long was I out?” Robert rasped.

  “‘Bout fourteen, fifteen hours I think,” Royd said sadly.

  “You okay Royd?” Robert sat up some more. “Why do you look worse than me?”

  He took a deep breath. “It’s ovah, bruddah. I cannot recreate da astral pulse.” He sighed. “Too much power, too small size. No pulse mean I can’t make da man Mecha. I not good enough, bro. Fail you. Fail everybody. Almos’...” he choked up a little. “Almos’ got you killed.”

  “Hey, listen,” Robert said firmly. “You might not believe in yourself right now, but I believe in you, Royd.”

  Royd shook his head, but he smiled. “This not a little league game, bruddah. This real life.” He stood up and headed for the door.

  “Royd,” Robert said, stopping him. When he finally looked over, Robert said, “You did your best. I can’t ask for anything else. Thank you.” He held up a fist, waiting for Royd to bump it.

  Royd still looked defeated, but after a moment, he held up a fist and tapped it against Robert’s. Then he left the room without another word.

  This story is posted elsewhere by the author. Help them out by reading the authentic version.

  When he was gone, Chase leaned against the bed and said, “I heard that big bastard cryin’ in the bathroom. Makes it hard to shit when somebody’s doin’ that next to ya, you know?”

  “Pretty distracting,” Robert grinned. “Yeah…” After a quiet moment, he asked, “Everyone else okay? Invisigal? Malevola?”

  “Invisigal’s fine,” Chase shrugged. “One thing she’s good at is disappearing when people get hurt.”

  Robert let out a dry laugh and narrowed his eyes at Chase. “What’s your deal with her? You give everyone shit but it always seems extra with Visi.”

  Chase turned his back, then said, “She’s a liability. And one of us needs to be objective when it’s clear something’s going on between the two of you.”

  “I’m not sure what you think you know,” Robert said, “but Visi and I are just friends. I think she wants more, the way she keeps talking to me, but that could also just be the way she is.”

  “And what about you?” Chase asked. “What do you want?”

  Robert shook his head. “With Visi? Nothing like that. If anything—”

  A thought suddenly occurred to him.

  “Hey, I asked about Invisigal and Malevola and you said Visi is fine. What about Mal?”

  Chase’s eyes darted away. “She’s alright. It’s just…”

  “What?” Robert asked.

  “Well, when Royd said he almost got you killed, he meant it.” Chase gave him a hard look. “Your suit exploded. The chassis was blown open. When the smoke cleared, you were laying there unconscious. Your arm, chest, face—you had severe burns all over, we weren't even sure if we could move you. You barely had a pulse.”

  Robert looked at his hands and arms, then down at his chest. There was bruising, abrasions, old scars—but no burns. “Chase, what happened? Royd said I was out for less than a day, someone's story isn't matching up here.”

  Chase turned his back again. “I'm not sure which I like less: you gettin’ cozy with the criminal or you being indebted to a demon.”

  He looked back over his shoulder. “She saved your life, Robert. Used that ability of hers, however the fuck it works. She pulled you outta the mech, held you like you was a fuckin’ baby…”

  He shook his head and turned fully to Robert. “Then there was a buncha red light and she screamed like she was in agony. When it was done, she set you down. No burns. Steady pulse.”

  Robert's eyes had gone wide. He muttered, “Holy shit.”

  “Yeah.” Chase crossed his arms. “Look, just be careful kid. Some people, they’re black holes. You reach out to help them and they just suck you in and… do whatever the fuck black holes do. I don’t know. They fuck you up.”

  ***

  They both laughed, then Robert said, “Your new look screams, ‘I know some science shit,’ so I was with you the whole way.”

  He swung his legs out of bed.

  “No, come on,” Chase protested. “Take the day off.”

  “No, really,” Robert countered, hopping off the bed. “I’m fine. All I’ve gotta do is sit at a desk.” He pulled the monitor pads off his chest.

  “Desk work doesn’t land you in the infirmary,” Chase said. “Think about that.”

  “I’ll mull it over,” Robert said, grabbing his shirt.

  Back at his desk, Robert found Blonde Blazer working his dispatch duties. “All we have to do is get in and out,” she was saying. “Stick to the plan. If they’re Red Ring or enhanced, proceed with caution.”

  She noticed Robert and said, “Oh. One sec,” then pulled his headset off and hopped up. “What’re you doing up?”

  “Turns out, I’m completely fine,” Robert said. “Just sorta time traveled several hours into the future where I feel pretty rested.”

  “Oh, cool, yeah,” Blazer said. “That happens to me every night.”

  “Wish I could say the same. How’s the shift going?”

  “Good,” Blazer said unconvincingly, then added, “yeah, uhm, challenging. Made worse by all the enhanced villains we’re dealing with lately.” She picked up his headset and turned the chair around where he could sit in it. “I have a whole new appreciation for you.”

  Robert sat down and took the headset from her.

  Blazer was quiet for a moment, then said, “I’m sorry about the pulse.”

  Robert just nodded and looked away quietly.

  “Give us some time,” Blazer said optimistically. “Royd’s a little down but I’m sure we can come up with alternate power sources.”

  Robert just nodded to her with a weak smile.

  As Blazer started to walk away, she said, “Hey, really looking forward to tonight. Perfect timing.”

  “Yeah, same,” Robert answered. “Um, wait, what are you—”

  She had already walked away.

  Robert thought about it for a second, then shrugged and turned to his work station. He noticed an expensive bottle of bourbon sitting on his desk. A sticky note next to it said,

  “Congrats on not dying. Drink this when the meds run out.”

  -Z-Team

  It made Robert smile.

  Then he logged in.

  Malevola was on her way back to base. The first thing Robert heard was Golem saying, “I’m no dispatch dude, but I don’t know if sending Malevola to sub at Sunday school was the move.

  “Alright,” Robert spoke up. “What’d I fuckin’ miss?”

  “Holy shit man, you’re okay?” Invisigal asked.

  “You gave us a fucking scare dude,” Malevola said.

  “Guess Mecha Man’s a bit sturdier than we thought,” Punch Up added.

  “Damn boy, you ate mad shit,” Prism said.

  “We got you a present,” Golem said. “Did you see it?”

  “Sure did,” Robert answered. “Thank you. It’s very nice.”

  “W-we were remiss,” Waterboy said. “I mean, uh, we missed you.”

  “Glad you’re back, Robbie,” Sonar added. “Things were almost too boring around here.”

  The first several calls were nothing crazy. Golem played cat sitter and Waterboy stood in line for someone who was totally old enough to play the game he was trying to buy. Someone hacked in to fuck with Galen’s standup comedy material (and also got access to secure SDN files, but mostly the standup comedy). Then some bitch named Karen called asking for a hero to come clean her abode.

  “Did Blazer hold down the fort okay?” Robert asked.

  “She did the best she could,” Punch Up answered. “Must be a bit rusty.”

  “She’s been away from the desk too long,” Invisigal added.

  “I thought this was an easy job,” Golem said.

  “Well, it’s not,” Robert said. “I just make it look easy.”

  “Shit, Robert,” Prism breathed. “Are you actually cool?”

  “He’s not,” Invisigal responded. “He’s just been gone all day so it seems like he is.”

  ***

  “Nah, he’s actually cool,” Malevola said.

  ***

  A call came in about a guy dressed as Phenomaman picking fights at a convention center. Robert sent Punch Up and Prism.

  “Flambae’s still ‘out sick?’” Robert asked.

  “Sick of your shit maybe,” Prism answered. “But yeah, I haven’t heard from him since last night.”

  “Funny,” Robert said dryly. “I thought he was gonna catch me on the way in. Fuck me up in the parking lot.”

  “Yeah I thought so too…” Prism said. She sounded a little sad.

  A call came in about someone worried that they had a ghost in their house.

  “Well ghosts are bullshit,” Malevola said on the way over. “But spirits are real. Can confirm.” She “called a friend” to help solve the issue, resulting in a verdict that the house was not haunted.

  City hall called and said they needed a hero to round out the guest list of the roast of the mayor. Then there was a gang war in the Warehouse District between the Red Ring and someone called the Freegoes, which, according to Invisigal, was an e-biker gang. A Red Ring lieutenant was spotted, Codename Beefcake.

  “Wooaah,” Malevola said. “Did you guys hear Vanderstenk and his wife got divorced?”

  “Sure did,” Sonar answered. “My entire portfolio is fucked.”

  “I knew the vibes were off this morning,” Prism said. “But I couldn’t tell if it was the divorce vibes or the shitty commute traffic vibes.”

  “Hey, maybe she’s not going to hell after all!” Malevola said.

  “Marrying someone can send you to hell?” Golem asked.

  “Yeah,” Malevola answered. “But only if you marry a billionaire.”

  A call came in requesting help with a LARP session.

  “What the fuck is a LARP?” Invisigal asked.

  “Stands for ‘Live Action Role Play,’” Robert answered. “But it’s not a sex thing, okay? It’s like, people dressing up and playing pretend type shit.”

  “That still sounds like a sex thing,” Invisigal noted.

  Robert sent Golem.

  The Yachties gang took over the Mayor’s afterparty and held everyone hostage on their yacht. A bank was frozen over which was perfect timing without Flambae. Someone fucked up ‘bring your kid to work day’ by allowing their kid to use a forklift. And then a bunch of rogue delivery bots attacked Vand-Co and the caller was screaming ‘there’s blood everywhere.’

  “Yo, who got the snacks?” Golem asked at the end of shift.

  “I thought you said you had it,” Invisigal responded.

  “Nah, that was me,” Malevola said.

  “Night everyone,” Robert said, letting out a yawn. “I’m… pretty fucking beat. I’ll see your dumbasses in the morning.”

  “I’ve got the booze,” Punch Up said.

  “Folks down for a carpool?” Prism asked. “I’ve got room.”

  “I’m good,” Sonar answered. “I’ll fly over in a bit.”

  “I-I would like a ride,” Waterboy said. “I-I’ll bring extra towels.”