March 18th, 2045

  “Take it! You can’t just not accept the delivery, Pete! That’s not how this works.” Alex yelled over the rain from the top of the skyscraper. His patience was worn thin, and his time was almost up on the last delivery for Saturday night. There was a very special ceremony he wished to get to.

  [Deliver the Pizza to the Customer – Pizza Peter – 0:18]

  Pete, or Pimple Pete as they called him, jiggly, definitively pimply, quite tubby and squat of frame, spun away and barely avoided the touch of the somehow dry box by rolling unathletically. “Nuoh!” he squealed. “If you’re late, even by a second, it’s free. That’s the deal! This time will work!”

  Cold spring rain crashed down on the dark city of Toronto, and up there on the hundredth-floor roof, Alex got soaked through. The pizza didn’t get wet, Nina’s magic made sure of that, but he sure did. He pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed while Pete scrambled to his feet and glanced down at the spiraling drop just a trip away. Pete then remembered to get his phone up and continue filming. It was Alex’s turn with the increasingly ridiculous recurring spectacle of Nino’s Pizza’s newest and biggest fan. Thousand followers across his socials, or so Pimple Pete had bragged to Francesca.

  Zooming in and tapping the focus, Pete made sure to catch Alex, his second favourite and his fan’s favourite deliverer, posing under the rain as lightning cracked and displayed his lithe musculature under his red polo.

  Perfect, Pete thought, The fans will love this! Too bad it’s not Francesca under the rain.

  His account grew every day, and to his credit, the hook was good. Each week he’d bring more dastardly locations across to Toronto, all in the hope of making the best pizza shop’s runners late and he the victor of free magical pizza. At the top of a building as the last delivery and under a torrential downpour had been a fan recommendation. Too bad Alex had shown up. All the commentors agreed that he was quicker and simply couldn’t be beaten with his combo of Skills.

  And this dude never tips. Insane, Alex thought before coming to a decision. Well, if they want a show, I’ll give them a show.

  “Ten! Nine! Eight!” Pete began to count down, hopeful that Alex had simply given up. “Seve—”

  “You know, Pete,” Alex called out as lightning cast a shadow over his face. Great footage for Pete’s MagiFans, his page where he charged for the best bits. He was up to three monthly subscribers! “You just can’t beat the best. I know it’s—”

  “Three! Two—” Pete interrupted.

  A final sigh and another flash of light revealed an empty roof. A moment later Pete’s camera caught Alex phasing back into existence far closer than he should have been, followed by the red rocket flowing and sliding over the slick concrete with a wicked grin. Combined with [Running – Level 9] and all his Title boosts, his [Phantom Step – Level 5] [Planar Skating – Level 2] combo made him a sneakered speed devil of delivery destruction.

  “One!” Pete leapt in a cheer. He’d done it! He’d beaten—

  [Deliver the Pizza to the Customer – Pizza Peter – Complete]

  [Credits: 38,232 -> 38,282]

  Somehow, Pete was holding a perfectly temperatured dry box and was fifty Credits poorer. “No! No!” He yipped as his phone fell, wheeling to find where Alex had gone. “How did you? Where did you—”

  A tap on his shoulder caused him to spin. Beaming and cross-armed, water pelted the delivery boy with a small online following. Pete stared open mouthed as Alex saw the red light on the back of the fallen phone still running. The camera wouldn’t catch the video, not at that angle, but the fans would still hear him. They deserved some spectacle, as at the very least, the annoying deliveries to Pete had taught Alex that so long as he touched the customer with the pizza box, the System contract Nino’s made with the Customer would complete.

  “As I was saying, before you so rudely interrupted me,” he shook his head in mock annoyance. “I know it’s hard to believe, so I’ll say it loud again.”

  Alex cleared throat while walking backwards, practically about to fall off the roof. He bent his knees and signed off, but not before sending a little nudge Emilio would hopefully hear. Or feel. He wasn’t quite sure how the cat seemed the know what he was thinking.

  Stolen content alert: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

  Please, big guy. Make me look cool. I’ll see you in a bit.

  “Thank you for ordering from Nino’s! Sixty minutes or less, or the pizza is free. Thing is, Pete, whatever you got planned for a delivery, you should try it, even though I personally wouldn’t, there’s not a single place that I couldn’t, because…” Alex jumped, throwing himself backwards off the building and readying his final goodbye.

  “The pizza will always be delivered on time!” He shouted and plunged to his death, firing a double-barrelled finger boom and winking at another satisfied customer.

  Just as he banged the shots, lightning cracked the sky and illuminated his gunning form. Emilio had heard his call. No bother waiting for a tip, though, as the look on Pete’s was extra payment enough.

  Damn good line, Alex thought as he patted himself on the mental back.

  The last thing Pete saw was the wink Alex was becoming famous for online. Rumor had it that the strange delivery boy was somehow connected to the mysterious CatMan, though the theory had yet been unproven in the deep depths of online forums for the perpetually screen attached. Pete scooped up his phone and signed off, secretly happy that Alex had delivered a spectacular end for his video despite missing the guns. He then recorded a quite unhappy monologuing sign off regarding the lack of his personal crush and muse, Francesca. At least he got to house a pizza over the city before a brutal walk down all those flights of stairs.

  And Alex? Alex hit terminal velocity in three and a half seconds, already having summoned Brody with [Illusory Copy – Level 4], who popped in right next to him in fall but lay comfortably with hands laced behind head and wind supporting his falling lounge.

  “One more time for practice before the ritual tonight!” Alex screamed over the wind and rain. Seeing Brody rolling his eyes, and wearing his pants no less, and now that he paid attention, a very well-fitting plaid. “Oh, come on, dude! Then you can go back to your…whatever it is you do with Giat in the unspace.”

  The bustling ground of the city came fast, with a few Adventurers and their fanciful Familiars pointing and preparing for critical impact of two jumpers. Skills kept some dry, other’s used Relics, but most just trudged through the storm as traffic rushed and crashed together. Brody pretended to think for a moment, then grinned handsomely at Alex.

  “Fine.” Brody said with a gravely yell. It was one of the words he had the least trouble saying, thanks to Giat’s extensive drilling. Whatever was involved there Snu never learned and Brody was a locked safe of secrecy.

  “Wooooohooo!” Alex yelled, turned on a blasting tune by Stare 42 on his [Audio Player], and just before he turned to paste, fired off the first step of he and Brody’s best combo with a [Phantom Step]. Blinking away, Brody snorted and ensured he got closer to the ground than Alex, his bottom just grazing the concrete before activating his part of [No-Matter Step].

  Angling his [Phantom Step] was the first bit, and due to his speed, Alex came out like a missile as he flipped and tumbled before skating around a group of giggling and glowingly stoned ravers with [Planar Skating]. Two steps in, his [Blazing Hot] flared, making the group cackle as Alex pulled Brody out again with [Illusory Copy]. Even with his speed he saw his clone’s smirk as Brody himself teleported twenty feet ahead and summersaulted over a mom taking her tri-headed triplets out for a rainy stroll under the protection of a Skill to keep them dry. Right when he felt [Planar Skating] about to run slide dry, he ported over to Brody and started the whole process again. Port to Brody, [Phantom Step] while pulling out his clone and [Planar Skating], all while Brody shot off himself. The portal back to Nino’s was two blocks or the length of eight hockey rinks away.

  About ten seconds flat, by his best guess, the pair flashed through the populace in the rain, Alex’s flaring feet looking like teleporting, flowing fireballs, the light and his hollers of joy at it all working together in perfect conjunction with Brody’s own impeccable timing. Tricked out cars and dangerous Adventurers were dodged, civilians avoided, and most onlookers just saw flames hurling and porting almost too fast to track. Brody went back to the unspace after the final combo, where he could now stay if he decided so, and he decided quite eagerly for want of getting back to his date with Giat. Alex himself let his speed take him as he stuck the landing on the slick floor of the city.

  Arms raised like Rocky, he spun and slid the last hundred feet over the wet ground, headed straight for the espresso portal. Though most people were distracted by the rain, or the hawkers, or the magical droplets that wiggled in one’s ear to get warm, a few snickered at the boy in the red polo cheering for himself and slipping right towards a portal. It was common knowledge that you didn’t go into those all willy-nilly. There might be ghosts and infinite, trapped craziness if you did.

  Alex’s slide stopped just before he was dumped in. He tsked as his flaming feet turned off. “Damn, I was this close to getting the full ten out of ten.”

  Then he dropped backwards once again, but this time into the portal, which provided a straight shot through the unspace back to Nina’s. Usually these days, he practiced his [Funamental Physician] and [Planar Skating], slowly allowing his feeble human mind to absorb more universal knowledge until he felt about ready to turn into a blubbering mess.

  It was the spring solstice of 2045, and after a brutal winter of frigid, sloshy, snow trudging deliveries, Alex had leveled up and made a lot more Credits. Which was fantastic, except tonight wasn’t about him.

  Tonight he headed for the edge of Algonquin, north of the city, for the first birthing ritual of the Garden Gnomes of Allen Gardens. He just had to snag his tips, meet his friends, bosses, and girlfriend, invited as guests of honor, and zip up there before the midnight festivities began.

  If there was time before bed, maybe he’d make good use of Snu’s Christmas gift. And with some luck, or some heavy leaning on of the particularly special Title perk of [Narrative Convergence], she’d join him.

  “Looking up big time for Alex!” He called into the unspace, hoping that the unfound hideout of Brody would hear his call. Alex never looked that hard. After all, his friend deserved private time with his own Dungeon Boss girlfriend.

  alive in my brain, but that's probably because I've written them coming up on 1,000 pages.

  WELCOME TO BOOK 3 OF DUNGEONS & DELIVERIES.