Behind us, the tiny skeletons of Depth Settlement watched in absolute silence. Hundreds of hollow eye sockets tracking our descent.
The green light grew brighter as we went deeper. The stone walls pressed in from all sides, cold and slick. Every few feet, I had to stop and shift position, finding new angles to continue downward.
"How far down do you think this goes?" the imp whispered.
"No idea."
"What if we get stuck?"
"Then we become a very disappointing ending to a very short afterlife."
Twenty feet down, the crack widened slightly. Enough that I could face forward again. The walls here were different—not smooth stone, but something organic. Ribbed. Textured like muscle tissue that had calcified over centuries.
"Daniel," the imp said quietly. "I don't like this."
"Join the club."
The breathing sound was louder now. Close. Each exhale sent warm, fetid air rushing up through the crack. It smelled like rot and copper and something else. Something ancient.
Thirty feet. Forty.
The crack opened into a chamber.
I dropped the last few feet and landed on soft ground. Something spongy that gave under my weight and squelched when I moved.
The chamber was massive. Cathedral-sized. The ceiling disappeared into darkness overhead. The walls curved away in all directions, barely visible in the pulsing green light.
And in the center of the chamber, surrounded by what looked like dried offerings—tiny bones, scraps of fabric, miniature weapons—was the source of the breathing.
At first, I couldn't process what I was seeing.
It was huge. Bigger than me. Bigger than the Curator's gallery entrance. Its skin was mottled green and gray, glistening with moisture. Four thick limbs splayed out from a massive body. Its throat pulsed with each breath, ballooning outward grotesquely.
It was a frog.
A giant, comically oversized frog.
And it was snoring.
The sound that had seemed so ominous, so threatening from above, it was snoring. Deep, resonant, world-shaking snoring, but snoring nonetheless.
The imp stared. "You have got to be kidding me."
"I thought it was going to be a demon," I said. "Or a god. Or some kind of eldritch horror."
"It's a frog."
"A very large frog."
"IT'S STILL A FROG."
The creature's throat ballooned again, letting out another earth-trembling HRRRRRNNNNNXXXXX that shook dust from the ceiling. One bulbous eye cracked open then closed again.
A name tag materialized above its head.
MAGNIFICUS THE ETERNAL WATCHER
GUARDIAN OF THE LOWER DEPTHS
LEVEL 12
STATUS: SLEEPING (DO NOT DISTURB)
"Level twelve," the imp whispered. "Daniel. Level twelve."
"I can see that."
"We should leave. Right now. Very quietly."
I stood there, studying the creature. The offerings around it. The way its massive body pressed into the soft ground, creating depressions that looked almost comfortable.
This thing had clearly been here a long time. The tiny skeletons above had been leaving offerings. Worshiping it, maybe. Or trying to keep it asleep.
Another snore rattled through the chamber. The frog shifted slightly, one webbed foot twitching.
Then it spoke.
The voice was deep. Resonant. Like someone had given a voice to a thunderstorm and taught it to be condescending.
"I know you're there."
I froze.
The imp's claws dug into my shoulder.
Both of the frog's eyes opened. They were massive—each one the size of my skull. Golden irises with vertical pupils. They focused on me with the kind of bored intensity that suggested I was an annoyance, not a threat.
"The small ones," the frog said slowly, "send someone. Finally. After four days of my extremely patient waiting."
It shifted its weight, the movement causing the entire chamber to tremble. The offerings around it scattered, tiny bones clattering across the spongy floor.
"You are..." The frog's eyes narrowed. "Level two?"
"Yes."
"They sent a level two."
"It wasn't really their choice—"
"To address me. MAGNIFICUS THE ETERNAL WATCHER. GUARDIAN OF THE LOWER DEPTHS. THE VOICE THAT ECHOES IN THE DARK. THE—"
"I got the title," I said. "It was pretty comprehensive."
The frog's throat ballooned indignantly. "Do you know how long I have guarded these depths?"
"No."
"THREE THOUSAND YEARS."
"That's a long time."
"I have witnessed the rise and fall of seventeen civilizations. I have seen gods ascend and collapse. I have eaten things that would drive you to madness simply by comprehending their true forms."
"Impressive," the imp said weakly.
"And yet," the frog continued, voice dripping with theatrical disappointment, "when I finally require the smallest assistance from the surface dwellers, they send me... this." One webbed foot gestured vaguely in my direction.
I looked at the imp. The imp looked back at me.
"What assistance do you need?" I asked carefully.
The frog's expression shifted. It was hard to read emotion on a frog's face, but this looked like embarrassment. "I have an... itch."
Silence.
"Between my shoulder blades. Well, where shoulder blades would be if I had them. The dorsal region. It has been bothering me for three days."
"You can't scratch your own back?" the imp asked slowly.
"My limbs," Magnificus said with immense dignity, "are not designed for reaching my posterior dorsal surface. It is an unfortunate quirk of my magnificent anatomy."
"Right," I said. "So you've been making the entire settlement above panic because you have an itch."
"I was attempting to summon assistance through vocal resonance. The small ones should have understood. I was very clear in my intentions."
"You were snoring."
"I was broadcasting distress signals through controlled respiratory vibrations while conserving energy."
"You were snoring and shaking the entire well."
Magnificus's throat ballooned again, this time with what looked like offense. "I have guarded these depths for three thousand years. I have never once asked for assistance. And now, when I finally require the most basic of courtesies, I am met with insolence from a level two surface skeleton."
The frog shifted its weight again, and I saw it—a small patch of scales between where its shoulders met its back, slightly raised. Red and irritated.
It really did have an itch.
"Okay," I said. "Okay. Let me see if I can help."
Magnificus's eyes widened slightly. "You will assist me?"
"That's why I'm here."
"Despite my... current lack of appropriate compensation?"
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"Despite that."
The frog was quiet for a moment. Then its throat ballooned again—but this time it sounded almost like a purr. "You may approach."
I walked forward slowly. The frog watched me with both massive eyes, unblinking.
Up close, it was even bigger than I'd thought. Its skin was covered in patterns—whorls and symbols that might have been decorative or might have been scars from ancient battles. Each breath made its whole body rise and fall like a fleshy mountain.
"Between the shoulders," Magnificus said. "You will know the spot."
I reached up. My hand looked absurdly small against the frog's back. The scales were cool and slightly damp. I found the raised patch and started scratching.
Magnificus made a sound. A deep, resonant moan of pure relief.
It started as a low rumble in the back of its throat. Then it grew. Deeper. Louder. The entire chamber vibrated. Dust fell from overhead. The green light pulsed in time with the sound.
"Is that good?" I asked.
"TO THE LEFT. SLIGHTLY MORE PRESSURE."
I adjusted. The rumbling intensified. The ground beneath us trembled. I heard distant sounds from above. Probably the tiny skeletons panicking again.
"YES," Magnificus said, voice thick with relief. "YES. EXACTLY THERE. YOU ARE—OH BLESSED VOID—YES."
I kept scratching. The frog's entire body relaxed, sinking deeper into the spongy ground. Its eyes half-closed. The rumbling shifted into something that sounded almost like singing.
"Three thousand years," Magnificus said dreamily. "Three thousand years and no one thought to ask if I needed anything."
"That sounds lonely," I said.
"It is the burden of eternal guardianship. One becomes... accustomed to solitude." The frog paused. "But yes. Occasionally, it is lonely."
I scratched for another minute. The irritated patch was smoothing out under my fingers. The redness fading.
"There," I said, stepping back. "Better?"
Magnificus opened both eyes fully. Blinked. Then let out a long, satisfied breath that smelled like ancient swamps and forgotten magic.
"Better," it said. "Much better."
A notification appeared.
QUEST COMPLETE: THE CREATURE IN THE WELL
RESOLUTION: DIPLOMATIC INTERVENTION
MAGNIFICUS THE ETERNAL WATCHER HAS BEEN APPEASED
REWARDS:
- UNCOMMON EQUIPMENT: TOAD'S BLESSING (RING)
- COMMON EQUIPMENT: WEBBED GLOVE
- SKILL POINT +1
- BONUS: MAGNIFICUS'S GRATITUDE
VIEWERS: 16 → 5
Two items materialized on the ground beside me. A simple silver ring with a small green stone. A right-hand glove with webbed fingers, made from some kind of waterproof material.
I picked them up. The ring was warm to the touch. The glove were surprisingly well-made.
"Those," Magnificus said, "are tokens of my appreciation. The ring will provide you with... let us say, enhanced diplomatic options when dealing with amphibious entities. The glove will help with swimming. And other things."
"Thank you," I said, slipping the ring onto one of my finger bones. It fit perfectly.
Magnificus shifted its weight again, more carefully this time. "You may tell the small ones above that I will not be disturbing them further. I will sleep more quietly. And if they require my assistance in the future, hey may send word. I will listen."
"I'll tell them."
"And you, Daniel Keres." The frog's golden eyes fixed on me. "You treated me with respect. You did not attempt violence. You asked what I needed. That is... rare. In this place. In any place."
"You're welcome."
"If you require passage through the Lower Depths," Magnificus continued, "speak my name three times at any well or pool you encounter. I will hear. And I will remember this kindness."
Another notification appeared.
MAGNIFICUS THE ETERNAL WATCHER HAS GRANTED YOU SAFE PASSAGE
ALLIANCE FORMED: THE LOWER DEPTHS
TITLE EARNED: FRIEND OF FROGS
"Friend of Frogs," the imp read aloud. "That's actually kind of cute."
I looked at the frog. At the offerings scattered around it.
"Get some rest," I said. "Try to snore quieter."
"I make no promises." But Magnificus's throat ballooned in what might have been amusement. "Safe travels, Last One. May your journey through the Hollow Kingdom be... interesting."
The frog's eyes closed. Within seconds, the rhythmic breathing resumed—softer this time, barely audible.
I turned and started climbing back up through the crack.
Behind us, the green light pulsed one final time, then dimmed.
When we emerged back into the main chamber of Depth Settlement, the entire population was waiting. Hundreds of tiny skeletons, arranged in absolute silence, staring at us with desperate hope.
Mayor Ossian stepped forward. "The trembling has stopped. The breathing is quieter. What happened below?"
"He had an itch," I said. "I scratched it."
Silence.
"Between the shoulder blades. He can't reach there himself. He's been trying to get someone's attention for three days."
More silence.
Then someone in the crowd started laughing. A high-pitched, slightly hysterical laugh. It spread through the settlement like a wave. Within seconds, hundreds of tiny skeletons were laughing, the sound echoing off the carved dwellings.
Ossian looked up at me. The Mayor's expression was unreadable, but its voice carried a mix of awe and gratitude. "You have saved our settlement, Surface God. You have done what none of us dared to do. You faced the Eternal Watcher and. dealt with him."
"Not a god," I said. "Just someone who was willing to talk."
"You are too modest," Ossian said, striking its staff against the ground. "We heard the trembling. The roars. The silence that followed. Whatever you did down there it worked. He will trouble us no more."
I opened my mouth to correct them, to explain that I'd just scratched an itch. But the imp squeezed my shoulder, and I caught the warning in its expression.
Let them believe what they want to believe, the imp's look said.
So I stayed quiet.
"Perhaps," Ossian continued, "you showed him the strength of the Surface. Perhaps you reminded him that even eldritch beings can be persuaded to behave." The Mayor's voice dropped to a reverent whisper. "Whatever method you used, it has earned our eternal gratitude."
Around us, the tiny skeletons nodded vigorously. Some looked at me with newfound respect. Others with something that might have been fear.
"CITIZENS OF DEPTH!" Ossian struck its staff three times. "This traveler has faced the creature below and emerged victorious! Let it be recorded in the Lower Records that Daniel Keres, Subduer of the Eldritch Horror, is welcome in our settlement for all time! And more—we pledge our aid to him for the duration of his journey!"
The crowd erupted in cheers. Tiny voices echoing off stone walls.
"Whatever help you need," Ossian said, turning back to me, "we'll provide it. You need only ask. You've done us an immeasurable service—it's the least we can do."
The imp leaned close. "Well," it whispered, "that's one way to make friends."
"I feel like I'm lying to them," I whispered back.
"You're not lying. You're just... not correcting their assumptions. Big difference."
"Thank you, Daniel Keres." Ossian bowed deeply. "May your path be clear and your enemies be... manageable."
I was almost at the top of the rope when my foot landed on something that definitely wasn't stone.
There was a soft crunch.
The entire settlement went silent.
I looked down. My skeletal foot was planted directly on top of a tiny female skeleton. She'd been standing with her partner—a slightly taller skeleton holding her hand—both of them waving enthusiastically at my departure.
Now she was... flat. Completely flattened into the ground like a paper cutout.
I lifted my foot slowly.
Her crushed form peeled off the stone with a sound like unsticking tape. Her partner was still holding her hand. Just her hand. The rest of her was a scattered pile of bone fragments and dust.
The silence deepened. Even the celebratory confetti stopped falling.
The male skeleton looked at the hand he was holding. Then at the pulverized remains of his partner. Then slowly—very slowly—he turned his hollow eye sockets toward me.
When he spoke, his voice was quiet. Calm. But it carried across the entire settlement with perfect clarity.
"You," he said.
I froze on the rope.
"I want you to listen very carefully to what I'm about to say."
The skeleton took a step forward, still holding his partner's severed hand.
"I'm going to find you. It doesn't matter where you go. It doesn't matter how far you travel into Hell. I will find you."
He took another step.
"And when I find you—and I will find you—I am going to make you pay for what you've done here today. But I won't kill you immediately. Oh no. That would be far too merciful."
The crowd of tiny skeletons began backing away, forming a wider circle.
"First, I'm going to break every single bone in your body. One at a time. Starting with your fingers. Then your wrists. Your forearms. Your elbows. I'll move methodically. Carefully. Making sure you feel every single fracture."
The imp whispered in my ear: "Should we... do something?"
"I think we should let him finish," I whispered back.
"Then I'll move to your feet. I'll crush each bone individually. Your ankles. Your shins. Your kneecaps—oh, I'll take special care with those. Then your femurs. Your pelvis. Your spine. I'll work my way up slowly. Savoring each moment."
Mayor Ossian had stopped striking its staff. Everyone was just... watching.
"And then I'll start on your ribs. You have twenty-four ribs, Surface God. I'll break them in numerical order. One through twenty-four. Left side first. Then right side. Then I'll break them again. Just to be thorough."
The skeleton's voice remained perfectly calm. Almost conversational.
"Then comes your skull. One hundred and twenty-six bones in the human skull, did you know that? Of course you didn't. You're too busy stepping on people to learn basic anatomy. But I know. I know every single bone. And I will introduce you to each one personally. As I shatter it."
"This is getting very specific," the imp muttered.
"Your jaw will go first. Then your cheekbones. Then your nasal bones. Then the tiny bones in your ears. The ossicles. Smallest bones in the body. I'll need tweezers for those. But I'll manage. I'm very patient."
He was still holding his partner's hand, gesturing with it for emphasis.
"After your bones are thoroughly broken, I'll move on to other things. I'll tie you to a post in the red wasteland and leave you there for the void-bats. I'll bury you in the Salt Flats for the crystalline scorpions. I'll drag you to the Screaming Chasm and throw you in—with a rope so I can pull you back up and throw you in again. And again."
Mayor Ossian cleared its throat. "Gerald, perhaps—"
"I'm not finished," Gerald said calmly.
"Right. Sorry. Continue."
Gerald turned back to me. "I'll find every person you've ever cared about. Every ally you've made. And I'll make them watch as I systematically disassemble you piece by piece. And then—then—I'll ask them if they think you were worth knowing."
He paused for effect.
"I'll steal your belongings. One item at a time. Over years. Decades if necessary. You'll never know when. You'll live in constant fear that your favorite possession might vanish at any moment. Because I'll be watching. Always watching."
"This guy is thorough," the imp whispered.
"I'll learn your routine. Your habits. Your favorite paths. And I'll sabotage them. Small things at first. A loose stone here. A frayed rope there. You'll start to doubt yourself. Question your sanity. Wonder if the universe itself has turned against you. And you'll be right. Because I am the universe now. At least, the part dedicated entirely to your suffering."
Gerald's voice dropped even lower.
"I'll haunt your dreams. I'll whisper in your ear while you sleep. I'll leave tiny bone fragments on your pillow as a reminder. I'll rearrange your furniture by one inch every night so everything feels slightly wrong. I'll replace your boots with identical boots that are half a size too small. I'll put pebbles in your shoes. Invisible pebbles that only you can feel."
"Gerald," Mayor Ossian tried again. "She's already gone, maybe we should—"
"Let me finish."
"Of course."
"I will dedicate my entire existence to making yours miserable," Gerald continued. "Not just your afterlife. Your existence. I will become the defining characteristic of your time in the Hollow Kingdom. Future bards will sing songs about my vengeance. They'll call me Gerald the Relentless. Gerald Who Never Forgot That Time Someone Stepped On His Wife."
He took a deep breath—which was impressive given that he had no lungs.
"And finally, after all of that. After years—no, centuries—of carefully orchestrated torment. After I've broken your body, your mind, and your spirit. After you've begged for mercy so many times that the words have lost all meaning. After all of that..."
Another pause.
"I'll forgive you."
Silence.
"Wait, what?" the imp said.
"I'll forgive you," Gerald repeated. "Because that's what she would have wanted. She was always the better person. The kinder soul. And in her memory, I will show you the mercy you never showed her."
He looked down at the hand he was holding.
"But until that day comes—and it will take centuries—you are marked. You are hunted. You are my singular purpose. Do you understand?"
I nodded slowly, starting to speak. "I'm so sorry, I really didn't mean to—"
"I don't want to hear it," Gerald interrupted, his voice still eerily calm. "Save your apologies. They mean nothing to me now."
Gerald carefully placed his partner's hand on the ground, arranging the fingers in a peaceful position. Then he looked back up at me. "Now get out of my sight before I change my mind about the forgiveness part."
I climbed the rest of the rope very, very quickly.
Behind us, I heard Gerald's voice one last time: "I'll see you soon, Surface God. Sooner than you think."
The imp was quiet for a moment. Then: "Do you think he'll actually do all that?"
I looked back at the well. Far below, I could see Gerald still standing over the crushed remains of his partner, his tiny skull tilted up toward us.
"I think," I said slowly, "that I'm going to be very careful about where I step from now on."