Today was…

  It was FRUSTRATING. It was so weird and so very, very frustrating! I don't care if Sheogorath is a Daedric Prince, I wanted to throttle him!

  Anyway, we got up this morning and headed for Solitude after a quick breakfast. I just wanted to get this whole thing over with, so we went straight into the Blue Palace, still dripping from our swim over.

  It was early enough that we caught the maids having breakfast. They weren't too happy that we were getting water on their nice clean floor, and were more than happy to give us the key to the Pelagius Wing to get us out of there before we tracked too much mud around.

  I did have to lie to them and say that Falk wanted me to check in on the place, though. Una told me to watch out for the ghost that haunts the place before we left.

  Dervenin didn't mention a ghost, but whatever. We didn't see one!

  Actually, the others didn't see much of anything today, aside from a few rooms of the Pelagius Wing.

  Me, on the other hand…

  Anyway, we went to the wing and started to look around. There wasn't much. Mostly unused dishes and furniture, some random bottles of mead and wine, a few barrels of goods… It feels like the first room is mostly used for quick, temporary storage, if it's used for anything.

  We kept going, and went down a short hallway. I hadn't noticed anything strange, and was literally turning around to ask if anyone else had when I heard a weird sound and felt a pulling sensation.

  Apparently, a portal like what we'd seen back in Morvunskar opened up just long enough to swallow me up before it vanished.

  I appeared in a clearing, with a dinner table set up in the middle, and three stone arches around it. There was a blond man wearing fine clothes sitting at the table, talking with a white-haired man sitting on a throne and wearing… Well, a sort of coat that was half purple and half orange, with swirling patterns and wildly-patterned pants. He looked almost like a jester, but his eyes glowed a milky white, and he moved in a way that felt too… Bouncy? Everything about him was exaggerated, like a stage actor, but there was an extra bit to it that felt unnatural.

  The blond man was Pelagius the Mad, but he seemed fine to me. The other man was obviously Sheogorath, the Daedric Prince of Madness.

  I went to get my spells ready, but they didn't work! It was then I realized that I was wearing some traveling clothes, a nice pair of boots, and a hat. That was it! No weapons, no cloak, no potions… I had nothing of mine!

  Sheogorath dismissed Pelagius as I came closer, and on a whim, I decided to grab what Pelagius had on his plate, because why not? I was curious if I would keep it if and when I went back.

  I spoke with Sheogorath, and told him that I came here to fetch him from his little vacation. We had a bit of a back and forth, and while I'm sure he's a riot at parties, I got tired of his Mad God bit pretty damn quick.

  I mean, I know it's not a bit. It's just how he is, but that goofy smile is full of really sharp teeth, and despite the weirdness, I can just tell he's got a mind as sharp as his temper.

  He said that he would end his vacation and go back if I found the way out. We were inside the mind of Emperor Pelagius the Mad! To escape, I'd need to help Pelagius fight the demons in his head and cure him of his insanity. Sheogorath gave me a staff with three faces at the head of it; one laughing, one wailing, and one screaming in rage. It's called the Wabbajack.

  I went through the archway on the right, and found a tiny, doll-sized version of Pelagius being bullied by an Imperial soldier. Sheogorath's voice echoed in my head, and explained that Pelagius hated and feared many things, but nothing more so than himself. The soldier was his Anger, and the tiny Pelagius was his Confidence. He suggested that I bring the two into balance to even the odds.

  So, I used the Wabbajack to make them both of equal size (that was SO weird), and Sheogorath said that I had done well! Pelagius had learned to love himself, and so could go on hating everything else.

  Lovely.

  I went through the archway on the left, and came upon a stone arena with two Frost Atronachs fighting in it. Across from me, on the other side of the arena, was Pelagius, flanked by two guards, watching the fight. Sheogorath told me how Pelagius' mother had taught him that danger could come from anywhere, and that made him more than a little paranoid. He told me to use the Wabbajack to defeat the enemy.

  Using the staff on the Atronachs just changed what type they were, and didn't seem to help or hurt them. I looked at the guards across from me, and used the staff on one of them.

  Both guards turned into wolves, and attacked Pelagius! They all vanished, and the Prince laughed. He said I'd helped Pelagius by letting him believe he was safe, for now.

  There was only one archway left.

  This one led to a clearing with a bed off to the side, and Pelagius was sleeping, but not well. He was thrashing a bit and mumbling to himself. It reminded me of Erandur. Sheogorath said that Pelagius suffered from night terrors, and that I had to wake him up. The only way to do that was to deal with his nightmares.

  Nightmares came in the form of a wolf, a bandit, fire atronach… All sorts of nasties, and each time I used the Wabbajack on them, they would change into something less dangerous, like a goat, or a campfire. One even turned into a beautiful woman!

  Eventually they stopped coming, and Pelagius woke up. I went back down the path to find Sheogorath at the dining table.

  I told him that I'd fixed Pelagius' mind, and the Prince was both happy and not. Pelagius was sane, and now boring, so Sheogorath agreed to go home. He told me to go, but I had no idea how to get out, so I just sort of stood there while he went over a checklist that included his beard, and summoned Dervenin in front of him.

  Dervenin was thrilled that they were going back home, and Sheogorath transported him back to the Shivering Isles. He then turned to me, and said that I could keep the Wabbajack. He also invited me to share a strawberry torte with him if I ever found myself in New Sheoth, then sent me back to the Blue Palace.

  It was almost evening when I returned right where I'd left, stumbling out of thin air. Lydia caught me before I fell, and Septim ran up, whining and wiggling, he was so happy to see me! The guys ran over, and gave me hugs, too. Valdimar scolded me a bit, saying that I'd scared them half to death, and Erandur praised Mara. Lydia said she was glad I had clothes! All of my things had dropped to the ground when I vanished, and they'd all wondered if I would reappear wearing anything at all!

  I took my things down to the basement to get dressed - There was nothing down there, really - and came back up, ready to leave.

  We left the Blue Palace and headed right for the steps that would take us home. Once we were out of Solitude and away from listening ears, I told them what had happened.

  Erandur said I'd done a good thing by helping Pelagius, even though I had to use the Wabbajack to do it. Valdimar wondered what the point of it was. He's dead, so does it really matter?

  Good question!

  Lydia just shrugged and said, "Sheogorath," and that was honestly explanation enough.

  We were back at the Manor by then, and it was my turn for dinner. I got to cooking while the others told me what they did while I was off clearing Pelagius' mind of his demons.

  Turns out they didn't do much. When I first disappeared, they got over their shock by calming Septim down so he wouldn't alert anyone to their presence. Apparently he started barking his head off when I left, poor thing. Then, they searched through the whole space a few times before deciding to just wait it out.

  They set up a table in the next room and lit some candles to make it a bit more pleasant. Erandur said they mostly talked, but Lydia soon got bored. She charred a bit of wood to make charcoal, and drew a chess board on the tabletop. Then, she sliced up some corks she found and marked them, and soon they were drinking mead from the fancy goblets they found laying around and playing chess! They also took turns sitting in a chair in the hallway where I'd vanished in case I came back exactly where I'd left.

  Granted, last time we went through a portal we ended up back in Dawnstar, but they agreed that they'd stay as long as their food held out. They had a good amount between them, and there was actually plenty to eat and drink in the barrels there, too. Valdimar figured they could easily stay there for a few days if need be.

  By the Nine, I'm going to tear up if I think about it too hard. I expected them to just go back to the Manor and leave a note. That's what I would do! But they were worried that I might show up hurt, or hungry, or driven insane by the Prince of Madness. They just wanted to make sure I was safe.

  Anyway, we talked plans over dinner, and decided to go back through Labyrinthian. We'll bypass Whiterun and head straight for Riverwood if we have enough light, but if not, we'll just stay in Breezehome for the night.

  That's the plan, at least. Here's hoping it works!

  Erandur's saying his prayers right now, and Lydia's sharpening her sword. Valdimar's measuring out some lines on a thin plank of wood. Apparently Lydia's deadly at chess, and he's determined to win a game against her. Septim's not let me out of his sight, sweet boy.

  I'm just glad we're all back home and safe. I put the Wabbajack in the basement, and on a whim, I put the hip bone in one of the empty display cases. I have no idea what else to do with it, but it feels wrong to just stick it in a barrel or something and forget it's there.

  At least it's staying out of my bag!

  We're in Riverwood, and I'm no less confused than when I got here.

  If Delphine is insane, she's a dangerous lunatic who needs stopped. If she's not, then… Well, she's still dangerous, probably, but I'm glad she's on our side? I think?

  Anyway, this morning we set out for Riverwood. Even though the blessing we got on the mountain has faded, we only had to deal with a handful of wild animals on the way here. Even Labyrinthian was free of frost trolls. I imagine it takes a little while for other ones to realize the territory is open for them to move in.

  We made no stops, and the weather was rainy most of the way but not too awful, so we made great time!

  We did fight an assassin when we got to the mountains past Whiterun, though. She was after me, but went down quickly.

  I felt strange walking back into Riverwood. It's only been a few months since the last time I was here, and while it looks the same, I sure as hell don't!

  My skin's darker from being in the sun, and the freckles on my nose are obvious, now. I've gotten stronger from the fighting and hiking, too. Granted, I've got a lot of new scars as well. My middle's a spiderweb of pink and red slash marks, same as my arms. Not to mention the splotches from all the burns I've gotten, and the creeping lines from Spark spells. There's even a few little marks on my face.

  I'm just glad they're fading fairly quickly, too. Erandur says it's all the Healing potions and Restoration spells. Each time I Heal to seal up a new wound, it goes to work on the scars. He also makes a salve to help fade them, too. It's how he'd kept his tattoos intact all this time.

  Lydia said that I wouldn't have that problem if I wore armor. She's right, but I never liked wearing it, and I'm not giving up the enchantments on my robes!

  It wasn't quite evening, so we decided to do a bit of trading before going to the inn. We went to visit Alvor's forge to sell off the assassin's gear when Faendal walked past carrying an armload of logs. He almost dropped them when he realized it was me! He was excited to see me, and I promised that I'd treat him to a drink tonight and tell him what I've been up to since I left.

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  Alvor also remembered me, and said that Gerdur would be glad to know that I'm doing all right. There were noticeably more guards around, and while dragons had been sighted flying over, none of them decided to bother the town.

  I poked my head into the Riverwood Trader to see how the Valerius siblings were doing, and check out what Lucan had on offer. They're doing all right, and while Lucan didn't have much I was interested in, I was able to restock everyone's arrows.

  We walked to the Sleeping Giant Inn, and Orgnar greeted me. I asked him about a room, but he looked confused when I asked him about an attic room. Delphine was walking by, and shot him a look. She said they didn't have one, but I could rent the room to the left, and had me follow her.

  I nodded to the others, and they gathered around the door, Erandur and Valdimar facing the rest of the Inn, with Lydia standing in the doorway, over my shoulder. Septim followed me. Delphine eyed us warily, but she looked more impressed than anything else.

  She addressed me as the Dragonborn, gave me the horn, then said we needed to talk.

  "Damn right we do," I said, but she just rolled her eyes and said to follow her.

  She gestured to the door, and everyone shuffled out of her way. I followed her to her room on the other side of the Inn, and she asked me to close the door. She didn't want anyone else to hear.

  I told her that anything she said to me had to be said in front of my friends, and she got exasperated, but said that fine, they could come, too. We crowded in, and she opened a secret door in the back of her wardrobe that led to a cellar room.

  The room itself is fairly plain. There's a table in the center with a map on it, along with a book about dragons. There's a practice dummy standing in one corner, an alchemy table in another, and some shelves and barrels and such.

  If not for the secret entrance and the map, it looks very normal.

  Once we were down there, I demanded some answers. She said that she knew the Greybeards would have the Dragonborn get the Horn of Jurgen Windcaller. Stealing it to find me was the only way to make sure the one claiming to be the Dragonborn wasn't some sort of Thalmor plant to trap her.

  She insisted that she's not my enemy. Apparently, she's part of a group that's been looking for the Dragonborn, and has been for a long time. She said that the Dragonborn is the only person who can really kill a dragon, and when we scoffed at that, she said that what she meant was that by absorbing a dragon's soul, I can keep it from being resurrected.

  That is, if I can do it.

  I said that I take some sort of power from them, yes, and she got even more annoyed. She said that I'd have a chance to prove it to her soon enough.

  I knew there was something she wasn't telling me, and when I pressed her for it, she told me the real reason she wanted to speak with me in the first place.

  Delphine has this wild theory that the dragons aren't returning from some far-off place or anything, like people've been saying. They're rising from the dead!

  She said that the dragon burial mounds are emptying. She's been watching them.

  What a normal hobby to have. Watching dragon burial mounds to make sure the dead don't rise is something every sane person likes to do after a hard day's work, right? Buckets of fun!

  I told her she's crazy, and she said that a few years ago she would've agreed with me. She said there was a pattern to the barrows emptying, and that she knew where the next dragon to be resurrected would come from.

  I asked how she figured all of this out, and she mentioned the strange stone I found in Bleak Falls Barrow that I gave to Farengar.

  Divines, that feels like an era ago!

  Apparently, she and Farengar are working together, and it's a map to the burials.

  All right, so he's not as awful as I thought. I'll give him that.

  Now Lydia spoke, and asked where the next dragon would rise.

  Delphine pointed at her map and said that the next one should be at the mound near Kynesgrove.

  We gasped, and I could hear the now-familiar sound of Erandur grabbing at his heart.

  We all looked at each other and I knew we were all thinking the same thing. Iddra and her family, and those miners in their tents… If Delphine was right, they'd be easy targets for a hungry dragon.

  She gave us a curious look, and Erandur explained that we often stay at the inn, and that we knew the people there.

  Delphine smiled at that, and said that we had no time to waste! She opened a chest and pulled out a set of leather armor.

  I explained that we've been traveling hard all day to get here, and it was nearly nightfall. As much as we wanted to get to Kynesgrove, we'd be no use to her if we were dead on our feet! We'll head out in the morning once we've had some rest.

  Besides, we'd already paid for our rooms.

  She huffed, and said that she'd meet us there. We left the secret cellar and followed her out into the main room of the inn. She told Orgnar that she'd be out traveling, and the inn was his until she got back.

  Orgnar just nodded and wished her "Happy trails." He didn't even look up from the tankard he was filling.

  We went up to the bar to order some drinks and dinner. I asked Orgnar if that was normal, and he said that yeah, she disappears like that from time to time. He wasn't worried; she always comes back.

  I nodded and we sat down to eat when Faendal came in. I had him join us, and we all had a good time eating and talking. Camilla's not any closer to choosing between him and Sven, but he thinks my "help" leveled the playing field!

  Anyway, it was a nice time, and helped us relax. Faendal said that his offer to join me on an adventure still stands! I just laughed and said that maybe I would take him up on it once we took care of "some business" we had to attend to.

  I know he's a good archer, but I don't think he's quite ready for a dragon.

  I started writing once he left, and we've been talking about whether or not Delphine's insane. On the one hand, the whole thing sounds crazy, but on the other, Farengar's an expert on dragons. He seems to think she knows what she's talking about, and according to Lydia, getting Farengar to agree with a theory he didn't come up with himself would take a miracle!

  "Like dragons rising from the dead?" Valdimar asked.

  Lydia agreed that yes, that would probably do it. "But who's resurrecting the dragons? And why?"

  That's the question, isn't it? It feels oddly convenient that the dragons returned when the war started to feel evenly matched, but then again, the first one was spotted the same day I showed up in Skyrim, so…

  Yeah, I don't know.

  It's a lot to think about, and honestly, I'm not sure I care if I ever learn the answers. All I know is that tomorrow, we may or may not have a village to save, and I need some sleep if I'm going to be of any help doing that.

  So… I thought I was going to be writing this in the Braidwood Inn or maybe Windhelm.

  Instead, we're spending the night in another hideout of the Silver Hand.

  After today, I'm glad for it. I needed to do something that felt… Normal? I think it's normal.

  Gods, it shouldn't be normal, should it? Going into a ruin or a cave and clearing out everything alive in it. At least with these people I can consider it a public service.

  Anyway, we left Riverwood and took the road past Whiterun, towards Ivarstead. None of us felt like taking the other road towards Windhelm, mostly to avoid the cold, and the wolf packs we always meet on the way.

  Aside from a random Altmer attacking us as we traveled, the way here was quiet. There wasn't even anyone lurking around Valtheim Towers as we went by. We crossed the river as soon as we could, and managed to skirt past the Giant encampment that's just across it by sticking to the mountainside.

  Of course, that led us right to here. It just looks like a half-ruined tower and a bit of wall on the outside, some abandoned keep, but like the other place, it's a lot bigger once you go in. There were only two people on guard, and they attacked without warning.

  Lydia said she heard the name of one of the Silver Hand camps was called Gallows Rock, and given that there's a noose hanging from a stone out front, this must be the place.

  Anyway, we kept going, with the promise that we would be back.

  We had a dragon to kill.

  The tower is above the road, just past a pond. There's a boat near the little island in the middle of it, and I'll look at that tomorrow.

  We found the path down to the road, and crossed at the same place we did last time - Where the fisherman's hut is. Another bear had taken up residence in the hut, but I was ready this time, and didn't catch any nasty diseases!

  We went up to Kynesgrove, and when we got close, Iddra ran up to us in a panic. She told us there was a dragon flying over the town, and that we should get out of there before she bolted back the way she came.

  Wait. She must've run out of wherever she was hiding just to warn us! She ran out, without any sort of armor or cover, into the open while there was a dragon overhead to tell us to get to safety.

  Damn. I'm still not sure if Nords are crazy or brave, but they sure are something.

  Anyway, we found Delphine and she told us to follow her. We went up past the inn, to the top of the hill…

  It was him again. Black wings, spiked horns, and that voice…

  The SAME DRAGON I saw at Helgen.

  I was too shocked to panic, I think. He hovered there, flapping his wings and Shouting at the pile of earth in front of us. The skeleton of a dragon crawled out of the dirt, and ash and fire covered it, then faded away to reveal red scales and living flesh.

  He said the dragon's name as he summoned him from the dead: Sahloknir

  Sahloknir spoke with him, and I heard a familiar name.

  Alduin.

  The same name from the prophecy-song that Erandur sang for me.

  We shot each other a knowing glance.

  Then, and Divines, I don't know how I didn't just faint on the spot, Alduin turned his head and stared right at me. He spoke in the dragon-tongue, and called me Dovahkiin.

  Then he spoke, not in dragon-tongue, but in our own. He mocked me for not knowing their language, then called me arrogant for calling myself a Dragonborn.

  I started to snipe back at him - Yeah, I know, this is the dragon that according to legend wants to swallow the world, but honestly, how much worse could the situation have gotten? Really? - but he said something to Sahloknir, then flew off.

  Of course Sahloknir attacked us, and we fought! I Shouted at him, throwing frost to his fire, and at one point I managed to get him to land with my Force Shout. He knows Cyrodilic, and spoke a few times. He said I had a strong Voice, for a mortal, and that Alduin had ordered him to kill us.

  Eventually, we won. Delphine watched as I took Sahloknir's soul. I had to lean on Septim a bit to stay up, but I managed to keep my feet.

  There's no way in Oblivion I was going to stumble in front of her.

  Delphine was amazed, and said that she'd tell me anything I wanted to know.

  Despite the freezing weather up there and how tired I was, I didn't want to wait until we were somewhere else to ask her questions.

  Delphine explained that she was one of the last members of an ancient order called The Blades. They're dragonslayers, and they serve the Dragonborn, the greatest dragonslayer. They've not been doing much since the last Dragonborn emperor died, mostly just waiting around for another Dragonborn, it seems. Now that the dragons are back and I'm here, they're ready to fight again.

  I said that I've seen Alduin before, and told her simply that he was the one who attacked Helgen, when Ulfric escaped. She finds that very interesting.

  She confessed that she doesn't know anything about why the dragons are coming back, but she suspects the Thalmor. We all wondered why she'd think that, and she pointed out that the war was essentially over when Ulfric was captured. If he'd been killed the rebellion would sputter and die. Now that he's back and the fighting has begun again, Skyrim and the Empire are weakened. It's been three extra months of fighting to spread their resources even thinner.

  She has a point. Ulfric -

  -/-/-/-/-/-

  Heard a noise. I'm pretty sure it wasn't anything. Maybe a mouse or something. Septim looked up, but put his head back down.

  -/-/-/-/-/-

  Right. Ulfric. He couldn't even spare a few guards to catch a serial killer lurking outside his castle doors!

  The Thalmor, and by extension, the Altmeri Dominion, are the only ones who have to gain from this. Apparently the Blades have been waging a secret war against the Thalmor this whole time, believing them to be the greatest threat to Tamriel.

  Can't say I disagree.

  Delphine wants to get into the Thalmor Embassy to see if she can discover their plans. She doesn't have any idea how to go about it, given how heavy the security is around there, but she's determined to get inside. She said that we should meet her back in Riverwood "sometime" to see if she's managed to find anything out or come up with a plan.

  With that, she bid us good hunting, and left.

  I just stood there for a minute in the blowing snow. I felt too much and nothing and I was just… Numb.

  It was all too much. It still is! What am I supposed to do?! Save Skyrim?

  HOW?

  The prophecies never tell you HOW to do it. Just that, "Oh, a Hero will Rise and save us all! Huzzah!"

  I'm going to get myself all worked up again if I think about it too much. I need to concentrate on now.

  Anyway, Lydia shook my shoulder and snapped me out of it, then asked me what I wanted to do.

  I told her I didn't know what I should do, and she corrected me. "My Thane," she said, in that tone she has, "I didn't ask what you should do. I asked what you want to do."

  I said that hiding under a pile of blankets isn't really an option, so "something normal" was the best I could come up with.

  Valdimar gestured across the river and said, "There's a bunch of Silver Hand bastards over there."

  Erandur pointed out that we could use the gold. The plan hasn't changed, has it?

  They were right. The plan hasn't changed. We return the Horn, then go back home before we head to Sarthaal. If we're lucky, we'll have enough to buy Proudspire Manor, then we can adopt the children.

  So, we left the empty burial mound, went down the hill, and crossed the water to get to Gallows Rock.

  It was almost evening by the time we got here, and we figured that at the very least, we could probably find some beds in here for the night.

  We were right! Like the other place, the hideout is way bigger than it looks, and a bit maze-like. There's all sorts of side rooms and such, and we found a bedroom with four beds in it. It's right next to the kitchen, too.

  Of course, it was crawling with members of the Silver Hand. We fought our way through most of it, but we know there's more we haven't seen.

  I think we found their leader, though. She was in some sort of inner sanctum-type place with a round dais lit by braziers all around it. There was a dead werewolf on a table that looks like an altar of some kind to me. We also found a table full of skulls, some still bloody from the defleshing.

  Lovely.

  But, right by the skulls, I found a spellbook for Invisibility!

  I can't WAIT to try this out!

  Anyway, after all that I was dead tired, so we came back here to the bedroom to settle in for the night. Besides, it's got a door we can wedge a chair against. We're keeping watch, too. There's no telling how many of them might still be lurking around, but that's the beauty of showing up in the evening; they're probably asleep.

  We had a quiet dinner in here. I mentioned how the song was right to Erandur, and he nodded. The others asked what we were talking about, so I told them about the book and the prophecy in it. Erandur explained how he knew the melody, and as soon as I mentioned that he sang it for me, Lydia and Valdimar's eyes lit up.

  Of course they asked to hear it, and eventually, he relented. He closed his eyes and sang for us, louder than he had before, but still quiet enough that his voice wouldn't carry far.

  Lydia immediately wanted to know what it meant, and we gave the best answer we could remember. Dammit. I knew I should have copied it down! I'll have to keep an eye out for a copy of that book for myself.

  Valdimar was, well… He looked hypnotized while Erandur was singing. I think I've only ever seen him get that starry-eyed at the Dwemer ruins in Markarth!

  He kept staring even after Erandur was done, and gave him a bumbling compliment when he was caught.

  Erandur, for his part, gave his nervous little laugh and said that he should hope so, after those years at the Bard's College!

  It's almost time for me to wake Lydia for her watch.

  So, not much happened after that, just the two of them being awkward to the point where Lydia got exasperated and declared it to be bedtime.

  I know I'm ready for some sleep!

  We'll figure things out tomorrow.

  I like the idea of the Dragonborn not trusting the Blades right way, or even liking them at all. It's just another bunch of people who know more than Bronwen popping up to tell her what to do! She deserves a day hiding under blankets, though.

  And of course I had to make Erandur sing again! ^_^