"Sir you have a right to remain silent!" a cop shouted. He was currently manhandling Dan and trying to arrest him.

  "HE'S GRABBING MY ASS! HE'S TRYING TO GET MY DI-" all the air is knocked out of Dan's lungs as his back hit the ground. The cop had kicked his feet out from under him.

  "Anything you SAY, or do will be held against you in the court of law! You have a right to an attorney!"

  "I have a right to not get molested! HEEEELP! POLICE!", "If you can't afford an attorney one will be provided for you-"

  The cop read him his rights and arrested him. And not long afterwards he was defending himself in court.

  "Your honor, I did none of the things they're saying, I was framed!" he pleaded.

  They didn't believe him. They said they had 'evidence', and that 'he had the gull to do it in broad daylight'.

  Completely circumstantial. The guy in the video just looked like him. It's a mathematical miracle, but it's not impossible for two people to look exactly the same despite not being related and also being in a mile proximity of the crime- it's all just a wild coincidence.

  But the United States justice system was a sham. And so he was sent to prison.

  It would be years before he was free man again, and by then he would be transformed by the system. He feared turning into some kind of a monster. Mean looking- all tatted up with piercings. And sick abs.

  The process was fast. They cut off all his hair and made him jump up and down naked. In the end the system always got what it wanted.

  And so, he was shown to his new cell. It was grey, and flat. With a shiny metal sink and toilet in the open. Two bunks, and a little rectangle window that looked out over the prison yard. A bald latino man with tear-drop eye tattoos look at him from the lower bunk.

  "Play nice." the officer said leaving him there in the small 10 by 10 foot cell.

  The man just starred at him with a stern almost-angry look. Dan swallowed hard. He wasn't a tough guy- he probably classified as 'skinny-fat', which was a way of saying that he was even less healthy than he looked. A greasy guy in his early twenties with skin issues.

  His cellmate on the other hand looked like he could be a professional wrestler.

  "I'll suck your dick if you don't kill me." Dan said flatly. The mans eyes widened in surprise. Then he busted out laughing. "I think we're going to get along just fine." the man smiled.

  They were surprisingly diplomatic despite appearances. His name was Mateo. Dan was instructed by Mateo on prison culture and basic etiquette. He told him that Dan was now a racist, and that everyone in the prison was. It was not optional, but it's something they left back in the yard, for obvious reasons.

  The following day Dan met with the 'woods', which was his gang. They were white and angry. They somehow knew his crimes and even some of his past. It's like they know any white person going to jail before they actually got there. They seemed to accept him for the most part.

  He traded some ramen noodles for some cigarettes and played basketball.

  Days went by and prison life gradually became his new normal. He'd play dice, workout, and smoke cigarettes.

  He read a lot of books. The bible, for instance. The woods really liked it. It was decent. He preferred stuff like Narnia or Twilight though. Oh and it turned out he was really good at chess.

  After his first month he decided to get his first tattoo. Him and Mateo nerded out over designs back at the cell.

  They giggled like school girls over their bottom bunk while doodling designs. Mateo was a tattoo artist and designed a personalized tattoo based on Dans notes. He wanted something that was 'cool' and 'pretty dope'.

  So they designed with that in mind. It ended up being a turtle standing upright riding a skateboard with sunglasses and holding a bottle of tequila.

  He took Mateo's advice and told the tattoo artist to make it small. He paid him five cigarettes and the artist went to work.

  "Are... You sure you want it there?" they asked. "Well yeah, I mean what's the point if it's not visible?"

  The tattoo of a turtle riding a skateboard was now immortalized on the side of his neck.

  After a his second month Dan was considering his escape. He'd been watching a ton of prison escape movies when he had TV time in his cell and he's been studying them.

  During one of these movies, Mateo told him something unsettling.

  "There's going to be a race war." he said.

  "R-race war?" Dan asked.

  "Yeah. The mexicans got on boots. Which means they're going to move on some people. Cause some trouble. Watch yourself out there- they don't care what you're in for during a race war."

  Then Dan experienced his first race war.

  He was sun bathing on the bleachers in the yard watching the guys play basketball. Smoking a cigarette. Then chaos erupted. A mexican man took a woods by the shoulder and started stabbing him with a sharpened tooth brush in the neck.

  "OH SHIT!" Dan cried out and hid behind the bleachers. He was still taking drags off his cigarette frantically. It was stressful after all.

  The woods started fighting back and before he knew it the prison yard was a war zone. Alarms started blaring and cops started shouting and beating people. A tear gas cannister rolled across the ground spilling smoke out.

  "Hiding pendejo?" he heard a voice say. He turned around and saw no one. Then looked down. A very, very short man was standing there. He wore an oversized white T-shirt over his prison pants.

  "WAIT! L-listen, I'm- I'm Jewish!"

  The little man stabbed Dan in the stomach with a shank. It's like he ripped a foot off his bunkbed and sharpened it on the concrete. It was a whole ass knife.

  He'd never seen so much blood in his life! He would bleed out any second- what would he last words be?

  He clutched the bleeding wound and groaned. "Aagh... I..ah! ...Fucked your sister."

  The man had a look of confusion for a moment at that.

  Dan wobbled- his legs felt weak. He fell over. The man started walking away to search for his next victim as he bled out.

  "And your mom! Your madre sucked my frijoles!" he shouted after him. The man stopped and turned around. "Wait! I didn't mean it!"

  They didn't care, he stabbed him again in the stomach.

  Every thing went black. It was a short life, but it was a good one. It could've been worse. His only regret was that he never tried anal.

  And then there was light. Blindingly bright white light.

  Dan blinked rapidly as his eyes adjusted to it. "What? Come back for round two beaner?" he said as he saw the blurred shape of a short person come into view in front of him.

  His vision focused and he saw who it was. It was a dark skinned girl about his age looking at him with a mix of confusion and loathing. "Oh sorry, that was prison talk. I'm not really racist. Is this the prison hospital? It's all... White. And bright." he started looking around. It was just an endlessly white expanse.

  She had been kneeling next to him but she stood then and flattened out the elaborate dress she wore. It was like a medieval style gown or something. Navy blue with gold and silver accents.

  "No. This is not the Leavenworth correctional facilities infirmary." she said as she walked over to a table that wasn't there a moment ago. She sat and begun pouring tea from china that was set there.

  "Tea?" she asked.

  "Am I dead?" he asked, he'd pulled up his shirt and was checking where he'd been stabbed. There was nothing there. His eyes widened suddenly. "Was I ever alive..?"

  Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.

  She sipped her tea. A vein was beginning to bulge on her forehead.

  She took a deep breath.

  "You are dead."

  The words hit Dan like a grenade went off in his lap. He flopped over onto his stomach and tears started to fall from his face.

  "Nooo! I don't wanna die!" he sobbed, "Are you going to judge me and send me to hell?", she opened her mouth to answer but he interrupted her; "-Don't answer that!"

  He crawled to his knees then looked up to the white sky dramatically. "God, why? I never asked you for anything! I never tried anaaaaal!" he cried out to the skies.

  'Splash'

  Dan felt the warm sticky liquid side down his face. He looked to see the disgusted face of the regal woman. He sniffled.

  "Sit. Now." she ordered him and pointed to one of the ornate padio chairs across from the table.

  He reluctantly complied by stomping over to the chair like a toddler throwing a tantrum. He plopped down and crossed his arms.

  She strolled around the table to refill her tea cup. She spoke as she did. "Finally... You are probably the most annoying reincarnation I've ever done." she said with an exasperated sigh.

  "Reincarnation!? Like one of those geeky ass animes? FUCK YES!" he stood up and sent his chair clattering to the floor.

  He did a quick dab then started dancing like a fortnite character. "I'ma get a harem! And money! Imma fuck a catgiiirrrl~" he started to sing. "Oh imma fuck a cat-giiirrll~"

  "You are insane." she pinched the ridge of her nose. "This person is literally insane. How could this be possible?"

  He stopped dancing. "Okay, okay. I'll be serious now. See? Serious face." he pointed to his forced serious expression. "So what are the juicy deets? Am I a demon prince or a villainess in an otome game? When do I get the harem? No loli's please. I'm christian."

  "There will be no harem." she said.

  "I don't like how confidently you said that." Dan said.

  "I'm aware your world has... Stories about reincarnation. But I'm afraid they're greatly exaggerated. This is not solely for your own benefit. And it's certainly not a 'game'."

  Dan started pouring himself a cup of tea. "Then tell me about it. What life am I reincarnating in? Will I start as a baby?"

  "No. You will retain your current likeness.", "Awe, really? I'm kind of a scruffy bastard. I was hoping to at least get better looks."

  "You will serve or die!" she shouted angrily. She was at the end of her patience. "You're a disgusting, chaotic demon! And you deserve to rot in your grave!" she huffed and caught her breath. "...that being said the system has chosen you. There's no going back now. So listen well for I will not be repeating this. The system has made you into one of it's paladins. Your oath isn't to the system though- it is to justice. And the truth. That is your oath, the truth oath. All those who serve the system have oaths. Break them and you lose your gifts and will die a mortals death."

  "...What's the system? Like a god? And I'm supposed to serve it- like what? A cop?"

  "Yes."

  He took a sip of his tea. A look of consternation on his face. He went to speak but stopped himself.

  He took another sip instead.

  "You will spend your days roaming the realms in search of injustice. You'll need this." she snapped her fingers and a book appeared in her hand. It was just a plain black hardcover book.

  "It contains all the things you'll need to know regarding your service to the system. You'll need to learn as you go. There's no better teacher than trial and error." she handed him the book.

  He opened it. The glossary labeled chapters like 'Oath Breaking', or 'The duties of Paladins'.

  "Just know- that turning your back on justice will weaken your oath over time. And doing injustice yourself will outright threaten to break it entirely."

  "What if I break it by accident? Not everyone has the same sense of justice." he said.

  "How you feel about it matters. If you feel that you're doing something unjust, it matters more. If you feel that you're not doing enough for your oath, that'll be enough to weaken it."

  "Greeeaat. No harems and I'm essentially a cop. Fucking lame. I better not have to swear abstinence."

  "Consensual sexual activity isn't prohibited by the oath. You'll realize how lucky you are to be chosen by the system in time. Next I'll explain how your new abilities work."

  "Dope."

  "You're stronger, faster. As I've said. But you'll also have the ability to 'channel truth', this is much like your worlds conception of 'mana'. The more you serve your Oath, the stronger it becomes and it can even manifest in reality. Empowering your strikes or healing your allies. Don't worry about training, it's as intuitive as breathing. Experience will teach you how to best use your new found abilities. The system is forgiving, but not gullible. In time it will test you. So do make an effort or else you run the risk of losing your status."

  She reached over to the book he was flipping through and turned it over to one of the last pages.

  "This is your character sheet. It shows your stats and level. As well as your-"

  "It is a fucking game!" he started laughing.

  She sighed. "Don't shout in my ear. Yes, again, I'm aware of the similarities but don't get wrapped up in preconceived notions. Unlike video games it doesn't update automatically, you'll have to write down any changes yourself as the system informs you of them. Level ups, stat changes and abilities along with their cost will be information it shares with you. Like a telepathic voice."

  "Cool, cool." he skimmed the page. There were different sections labeled from abilities to stats

  Stats

  Agility - 10

  Constitution - 5

  Strength - 4

  Charisma - 3

  Intelligence - 10

  Oath - 12

  Wisdom - 6

  "Are these high?" he asked.

  "They're abysmal. Only your Oath stat is at a regular starting amount, but that makes sense. The system wouldn't of chosen you otherwise."

  "Damn. So what, I like, magically get smarter and stronger compare to before now?"

  "Yes, your progress will happen in stages. If you gain a single point in strength for example, you'd be about 25% stronger. And with 4 points you're about strong enough to carry 200 pounds. A constitution of 5 make it to where you could survive falling from any height in your world. Though it would hurt and you'd break your legs."

  "I'm already superhuman then! That's a pretty good start."

  She nodded. "You'll get used to your new abilities quickly. Experiment, have fun. And try to serve the system."

  "What's a 'divinity charge'?" he asked, he was reading the 'abilities section';

  Abilities:

  Lay On Hands - Potent healing spell, the paladin places both hands on the desired recipient and expends between 1 or 2 charges of divinity to heal great wounds instantly.

  Bless - The paladin blesses the recipient or themselves, bolstering their confidence and courage. It does not cost any charges of divinity to do this- but is limited to 3 recipients at a time.

  Divine Smite - The paladin enhances a single attack with the power of their oaths dealing overwhelming damage to their target. This ability will use all reserved divinity charges automatically and is doubly powerful for each charge used.

  Turn Undead - Undead are weakened by your presence

  Shield of Truth - A barrier of gold light will temporarily surround the target, following and protecting them for thirty seconds or until sufficient damage destroys it. It costs 1 divinity charge.

  "That's your mana essentially. If your oath is healthy then your charges replenish quickly. If you're a shitty paladin it could take days just to replenish a single charge." she said.

  He slammed the book closed.

  "Okay, I think I got the gist of it. Do you got some starter gear for me? Maybe a suit of armor or something?"

  "Hmm... Let me see what I got." he snapped her fingers an a heavy wooden chest appeared on the ground. She opened it up and started rifling through it. He could see crossbows, chest pieces, and swords.

  "Ah... This could work." she brought out a sword. It was just a regular sword, scratched and chipped in a few places. Brown leather hilt and iron cross guard. It was about 30 inches long.

  "...That's it?"

  "You'll find the things you need during your travels. Okay. So I said you're a paladin to the system, but the place you're going to doesn't really see it that way. They have gods. So when you refer to the system, say 'gods' and stuff. Like Minerva, that's their god of light." she said.

  "I've played skyrim before." he said.

  "Good, so you're pretty much prepared. I have one more final piece of advice for you. This isn't required by the system to say, but I like to tell each person I guide during reincarnation."

  "What is it?" he asked.

  "Don't die. The world you're heading into is dangerous, and this entire process often makes reincarnations feel invulnerable. If you get hit it will hurt. And there won't be any second chances this time. Take your time learning your new powers. Over prepare for everything. Live a few years quietly in town as their doctor or whatever before heading out to clear dungeons and fight in wars. So many people reincarnate and are way too ambitious and get themselves killed. Start small."

  He nodded, taking the sword from her. "I will. Thanks. Sorry for annoying you so much, I'm told I can have that affect on people."

  She smiled. "It's okay. I shouldn't of gotten so angry, people all react to dying in different ways and I forgot that. You were just so different than most. I hope your next life turns out better than the last."

  "Me too." he said with a bitter sweet smile. "Where will I appear? Like in this other world?"

  "I'm don't know. The system will make sure it's safe and reasonable enough at least. It'd be a bit unfair to pop you out in the middle of a dragons lair your first day." she chuckled. "Are you ready?" she asked. A serious undertone to her voice.

  He gulped. He checked his book in one hand- his sword in the other. His vibrant orange pants and white shirt. Everything was in place.

  "I'm ready."

  The white light around them began to glow even brighter until him and the systems guide were enveloped in it. He felt the room vibrate at a high frequency and then darkness encompassed him again. Suddenly.

  And when he came to, he was lying face down on a dirt road. In the middle of the wilderness. It was daylight and the trees leaves swayed gently in the breeze. It reminded him of the forests in California.

  At least he was on what seemed to be a road. If you could call it that. More like a hiking trail. But a trail was far better than no trail. So he began to follow it, where ever it led. He was beyond occupied by his thoughts.

  His memories of his life before swam through his memories. If only he could've brought his family here. Or his phone. It was like being in a sensory deprivation tank. No way to scratch his ADHD itch. No posts to follow, or like. No video shorts of cats to giggle like a child at.

  But, he was fast as shit now. He realized when he tried running down the trail to kill time.

  'CLINK!'

  A burning pain shot through his leg.

  "AH! FUCK!" he shouted. A rusty metal beartrap had closed on his ankle. He pushed the leaves aside that had partially obscured it. "Who the fuck puts a bear trap in the middle of the road!?"

  Blood oozed around the metal teeth. It hadn't broken the bone at least.

  He pried it open and to his surprise it clinked back open easily. He shakily stumbled away a few feet and sat down clutching his mangled leg.

  "Okay... Okay... How do I do this? Heal. Heal leg now." he said clutching both his hands on his leg.

  'Heal, heal, heal' he thought to himself.

  And slowly he felt something rising within him. Drawing from some kind of reserve of power. It began to coalesce around his stomach.

  Then he farted.

  "Damn. This is harder than I thought. I just want to use that lay on hands ability-"

  As soon as he finished saying the words 'lay on hands' his flesh closed up and the pain faded. Leaving behind skin that was better than before. He felt at his face and even his acne had cleared up.

  He was about to celebrate when he heard the nature behind him rustling with activity. A man was crouched low and approaching him with a bow raised.