Emily twirled a lock of blonde hair around a fuzzy digit. Two hours before last call at the bars was a bit of a dead zone for pizza delivery. It would pick up after the bars got out and patrols called bellowing for something cheap and greasy to help keep the liquor down, but it was all boredom for the time being.

  She checked her nails to make sure the polish was still intact. Lime green and glossy, which matched her green and lilac uniform, inlaid with glitter sparkles which matched the sign. Unintentional, but she liked to tell her boss she did it on purpose.

  Her ringed tail flicked a few times as she glanced back at the kitchen. Randy and Taryn were chopping vegetables. Stovepipe Phillips was pounding his massive bear fists against a lump of dough. The boss was, naturally, back in the office.

  She wished she brought her smartphone today, but she never liked bringing it to work. She already lost one this year in a freak sauce accident. Maybe she could take up reading? No, no, let’s not go crazy.

  A trio of jaunty blips emanated from the now vibrating phone at her side. She snapped a paw out and picked it up on the first ring. Finally, some action!

  “Lucky’s Pizza Cave, where deliciousness is at the end of the rainbow. How can I help you?” She spat out the line she could say in her sleep. How many times had she said it by now?

  She was so excited, but heard snickering on the other end of the phone. She suppressed a sigh. Oh good, middle school boys. This would be entertaining. She waited for the laughter to die down enough for them to speak.

  This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.

  “Um, yes, hello… Ma’am.” A slightly higher pitched voice said, punctuated by another giggle. “Do you have meat there?”

  “Yeah, we have meat.” She said flatly, trying not to bait them with any innuendo.

  “Really? Well, umm…..” The voice paused. They must not have planned this all the way through. Chatter sounded in the background as the boys tried to figure out which way to take this joke.

  “Um… Okay, yeah, meat’s good. What kinda’ meat do you got?” They asked. More giggling. “Is it… Long meat or skinny meat?”

  Emily tried not to scream at him. A customer service smile crossed her face, despite the fact she was on the phone. Training and patience. “For pizza, we have chicken, sausage, pepperoni, fried chicken, salami, ham, and bacon. We also have regular and boneless chicken wings. Have you decided what you want?”

  “Uh, hold on.” This was not the answer they were looking for and she heard more chatter in the background. Then laughter.

  “Right, right. Um, do you have dragon meat?”

  Emily stiffened and the cheeks under her fur turned red. She took a deep breath and let it out. “Sir, you can’t find a dragon on sale.”

  Laughter from the other end. “Well you better drag it off then!” More laughter and the sound of call termination.

  Emily let out a breath. She heard the door to the boss’s office open. Mr. Marquiso darted out to Emily’s side. She never knew how a gryphon moved so quickly through the store without upending anything. The kitchen staff dodged out of the way, Stovepipe Phillips managing to save his pizza dough.

  “I heard them ask for a dragon. Is everything on the level?”

  “No, no, crank call, I think.” Emily held up her hands. “I said the passphrase and everything, but it was just some kids. False alarm.”

  Mr. Marquiso visibly relaxed. “Good, good. The secret menu is secret for a reason. See that only the worthy order it.” He reached out a massive, clawed hand and patted her on the head. “You did great, Emily. Keep up the good work.” He smiled, looking more like a grimace due to his beak, and slipped back into the office.

  Emily was no longer bored.