I love her more than I’ve ever loved anyone. I love her more than ants love hills and spiders love corners. I love her with the passion the sun holds for the earth despite the sky being in the way. I love her with need, like a victim of hunger I crave for her. She knows this, she knows.

  But this doesn’t mean she feels the same way about me. I told her I loved her a little too soon the first time, I was too excited by her presence. The scent of her, the sound of her. All of her forms a symphony so beautiful it urges each of my breaths to come out quicker and my heart to follow suit. She turned me down, told me she didn’t know me.

  So I figured, I’ll enable her to know me. I told her my favorite color was blue and I held back the bitterness the lie held, how could the truth prove my case for her? Telling her my favorite color was red would just paint me a murderer of sorts for what else screams red like blood? No, I wanted her to think of the open sea and the open sky when she thought of me so I told her my favorite color was blue.

  I told her music speaks to my soul, it enables me to be fixed on emotions that otherwise escape my attention. I told her that when music plays I journey within myself and in there I find treasures untold, there, lying in the open waiting for anyone to claim them. I wanted her to see that I am full of everything her heart might desire, and so I said a second lie. The truth is, music exists just as paintings exist and neither touches me nor comes close to my soul. But telling her this will just make her think I’m cold, I want her to picture warmth when she sees me. I want her to know my soul is a home for her dwelling.

  When I spoke all she did was look at me. I piled lie after lie, painted myself the picture perfect man, a man with no flaws and full of advantages. Someone who can dig deep within her and touch her in places she never knew existed. God I lied, I lied with the desperation of a man whose life was at stake. I put everything behind my tongue, begged it not to yield a single ounce of truth and as I spoke tale after tale the look in her eyes unnerved me. She knows, she knows.

  Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.

  She knew I lied. I struggled with how she knew I lied later. Was it my tone of voice? I’d read somewhere that there are people who can tell a lie from the truth very easily based on the tone of voice. Or was it my eyes? They say liars can never look you in the eye. But I’d made sure to look into her eyes as I lied, never even blinking. Or did I take this too far with the not blinking thing? She said no to me. I told her every bit about me that I could possibly master under false pretense and she still said no.

  What did she want? The truth? That my favorite color was red because blood looks beautiful? What am I, a vampire? I met her again several days later and I resorted to lying again. Telling her about my grand plans to travel the country, to go to the beach and write my name in the sand like I saw others do. She just smiled at me, and deep down I knew that she knew. Knew I’d never been to the beach neither did I desire to go there. Frankly the ocean scares me, whales dwell there. I’m afraid of whales. But she didn’t need to know that, all she needed to see me as was someone adventurous yet her eyes as I spoke, they unnerved me. She knows.

  I started avoiding her. Avoiding that knowing look of hers, why was it that she presumed to be holier than the rest of us? Is love a reason to look done on one with doubt? I didn’t deserve to be doubted, I needed her to see that I am worthy of her, even if it were a lie. Why couldn’t she meet me half way? Why couldn’t she reward my efforts with at least a kiss. Wouldn’t the kiss be true? Wouldn’t it mark the beginning of something that was true? But no, every time we met I found myself fabricating more things and in the end she turned me down each time. I find myself wondering whether I loved her in the first place, or was I just lying to myself? Somehow, I think she knows this. She knows.